Part 3:
The End of the Innocence

For the first time, I sat at the table with the Four Kings as a near-equal, not as Kunzite-sama's pet. I had a chair, not a stool, so that I could actually look everyone in the eye if I chose to do so.

The reactions of the other three Kings to this development were much the same as those I'd received the first time I'd attended one of those meetings at all. Andradite-sama gave me an ironic nod as he seated himself across from me. Jadeite shot me a cold look, but said nothing. Only Nephrite, arriving late, dared to comment.

"What is that doing here, Kunzite-san? Can you not keep it in its place?"

Kunzite-sama's eyes slid shut for a moment. When they opened again, they were blazing with blue-white fire, but his tone of voice was deceptively mild.

"Given that there has been an attempt on my life, now, as well, I thought it prudent to begin training an apprentice, so that there will be someone immediately available to replace any of us who suffers an unfortunate and premature death. You must remember that what is happening here now is a minor side-issue of concern only to us. Metallia will not be pleased if we must abandon the campaign on Earth to search for a replacement King."

"And so you choose your catamite." Nephrite still hadn't sat down.

"And so I choose someone whom I trust not to attempt to kill me while I am training him," Kunzite-sama replied. "In any case, the matter is closed, and I expect to hear no further complaints from you, Nephrite, or I will demonstrate the reason why I am still the First King, and you are only the Third!"

The two of them glared at each other for a moment, Nephrite's eyes flaring to match my lover's. Then the auburn- haired King backed down, as he usually did. Even he was intelligent enough to know that his Star-magic was no match for Kunzite- sama's powers. But his eyes seemed to promise, one day.

"Perhaps you might care to inform us of why you convened this meeting, Kunzite-san?" Andradite-sama was obviously trying to distract the combatants.

"Two reasons. First, I wished to introduce Zoisite-san to you all, and inform you that he will be present at all meetings from now on--and that he is off-limits for challenges, at least for the present, due to his lack of combat training. You will pass this information on to the demons under your command. Secondly, Nephrite, I wanted to warn you to purge your signature from your constructs the next time you try to attack me. Or had you assumed that I would be too dead to perform an analysis?"

I smiled at Nephrite as his face drained of color. For once, the auburn-haired king didn't seem to notice that I was making fun of him.

"You are fortunate," Kunzite-sama added, leaning back in his seat, "that Beryl favors you. If she did not, or if I felt that Zoisite-san were truly prepared to take over from you, we wouldn't be having this conversation. I am not about to ask you whether or not you staged the other attacks, since at the moment I have no reason to believe that you would tell me the truth, but be aware that we all know what you have done."

Nephrite's expression twisted into something terrible as his eyes flashed blue-white and he snarled something obscene about Kunzite-sama's sexual preferences and practices.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but actually, he doesn't," I said sweetly, and those blazing eyes were turned on me.

Cold, I thought dazedly. There was an icy fire in the air around me that simultaneously burned and froze. I seemed to be paralyzed, unable to speak, unable to even see anything except those two white glows. A resonant vibration filled my entire body, followed by a sudden surge of the same tingling warmth as I'd felt when I'd drained the life out of my old body. As the warmth spread, my vision cleared, and I found that I could move and speak and think again.

Nephrite snarled again, incoherently this time, and rose from the table so quickly that his chair toppled over, his eyes reverting to their normal blue again. He teleported without saying another word. Jadeite also rose, more sedately and with a polite inclination of his head in Kunzite-sama's direction. Not that that meant anything. Courtesy is cheap.

"I had best check on Nephrite-san to make certain that he isn't doing anything stupid--with your permission, of course, Kunzite-san," the blonde King said.

Kunzite-sama waved a hand. "Go." Jadeite vanished.

I slumped in my seat. The delicious warmth that I'd been feeling had gradually drained out of me while Nephrite and Jadeite had been making their exits, and I was feeling cold and empty again.

"How long have you been a demon, Zoisite-san?"

I forced myself to look up. "I'm not sure, Andradite- sama. A few hours."

The black-haired King's eyebrows rose, and he glanced at Kunzite-sama, who nodded.

"You've never questioned my judgment before," my lover said, with a smile.

Andradite-sama shrugged. "I think that your obvious attachment to Zoisite-san would be capable of causing you to behave irrationally, but it is true that that does not seem to be the case here. No disrespect was meant."

"Kunzite-sama," I pleaded. I was shaking with cold, and my chair seemed to have turned into a block of ice underneath me.

"If you'll excuse us?" my lover asked his fellow King.

"Of course." Andradite-sama seemed surprised that he was even bothering to ask. "It would be a terrible thing if such a promising young demon were permitted to die of spell-shock."

Kunzite-sama pulled me to my feet, wrapping me in his arms and supporting me against his body as we teleported, then depositing me immediately on the bed as we arrived in our shared suite. He stripped off my uniform, then his own, with a few quick motions, then lay down beside me, pressing himself against me again. Gradually, the warmth of his body cured the worst of my shivering.

"What was that?" I asked when my teeth had stopped chattering.

"Magic," my lover replied. "When Nephrite turned his attention on you, your power reacted as though it was an attack, and started to mass to counter it. The problem was that you had no control, so you drew too much energy too quickly, and had no idea of how to get rid of it afterwards. Training and practice will take care of that. But Nephrite thought that you were doing it intentionally, since he wasn't bright enough to realize that there was no way that I could possibly have started training you yet." Kunzite-sama chuckled. "I don't think I've ever seen him so frightened. I'm proud of you, Zoi-chan."

"Thank you," I whispered as I reached downwards. I was finally warm all the way through, and the feel of his body against mine was rousing instincts that had nothing whatsoever to do with magic. Kunzite-sama's mouth quirked upwards as my hands began their work, and he gently returned the favor.

Making love felt different in my new body. Not only had my normal senses been heightened to an unexpected degree, but I seemed to have acquired a couple of new ones that cut in and out at irregular intervals. And so I was aware of Kunzite-sama not merely as a warm presence beside, on top of, or inside me, but also as . . . I don't know. A concentration of magic and life energy? That's the best I can come up with, anyway. And I could feel him observing me on the same level.

Afterwards, feeling tired but satisfied, I dozed in his arms for a while. I thought he was asleep, but realized otherwise when he began to carefully pull the one arm out from under me, waking me.

"Kunzite-sama?" I whispered.

"You don't have to call me that anymore, you know," he murmured back. "We're very close to being equals now, Zoi-chan. One day, we will be."

"No, we won't," I said. "Even if I become a King, which I don't think I ever will, I'll never be your equal, any more than Jadeite and Nephrite and Andradite-sama are your equals."

"You will be a King, Zoi-chan. The nomination can't be withdrawn, and Nephrite's going to get himself killed eventually. He's far to ambitious for his own good. And when he dies, Jadeite will become Third King and you'll move up to Fourth."

"I don't think I'll ever be ready for that."

"Not for a while, anyway," Kunzite-sama admitted. "You're only beginning to get used to being a demon. I'd give it a year or two before you're really ready to be a King."

"A year or two?! Kunzite-sama, there are centuries-old demons who apparently aren't ready for that yet!"

"That's because they don't have the right qualities for the job. A King needs to be intelligent, organized without being inflexible, and ruthless and ambitious without being too aggressive. You're all of those things . . . or you will be once you learn not to be so reckless. Baiting Nephrite is a foolish pastime, and I expect you to give it up."

I sighed. "Yes, Kunzite-sama."

But, like a fool, I never did.


For the next little while, I went everywhere with Kunzite- sama. Training to be a King meant that I had to learn how to perform all of the same duties that he did. A lot of them I hated. It was difficult for me to believe that, say, Nephrite, did his own paperwork the way Kunzite-sama did. But then again, I had no objection to becoming a better King than Nephrite. None at all. And spending my days with Kunzite-sama meant that we could sneak off by ourselves behind closed doors whenever we had a free moment and . . . Well, do I have to lay it all out in excruciating detail again? Let's just say that I learned a whole range of new things that I could do while standing up.

Well, regardless of that, that was why I was with Kunzite-sama when Andradite-sama came to visit him, to discuss business without Nephrite and Jadeite overhearing. Actually, I still expected him to exclude me from the conference, but he didn't, for whatever reason of his own.

After the first ten minutes or so, I almost wished that they had excluded me. I mean, it was just so damned boring! Training reports, quartermasters' reports, and, for all I know, counts on the wild mushrooms growing in the tunnels under Beryl's palace! I stopped listening after the first few minutes, instead roving the edges of the room and examining Kunzite-sama's collection of trophy weapons, which, unlike Nephrite's, were kept sharp and clean, ready for use.

There was one that I particularly liked, a slender spear that was icy cold to the touch. I'd toyed, at odd times, with the thought of asking Kunzite-sama to give it to me, but each time I'd decided to be content with my dagger. Still, I might try conjuring something similar, when I had better control of my powers, which I still had only the vaguest idea of how to use. Under Kunzite-sama's instruction, I'd learned how to levitate myself for a few seconds, and I'd once produced an unexpected bolt of lightning in the middle of a combat training session that had singed the hem of his cape, but I hadn't been able to repeat that when I'd tried. Kunzite-sama had told me to be patient, that it would come. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt for now--after all, I'd only been a demon for four days.

I turned my attention back to what the two Kings were saying with a soft sigh. Kunzite-sama was sure to quiz me on their decisions later, asking me what I might have done differently in their place. That meant that I had to try to listen to at least part of the conversation, so that I'd have a few of the answers.

And that was why I saw the faint glimmer gathering around Andradite-sama's hand. At first, I didn't think anything of it. Why would he attack Kunzite-sama? So I didn't do anything until I saw his arm come up. He still hadn't said anything to Kunzite-sama, who seemed to be engrossed in a ledger.

"Kunzite-sama!" It came out as something very close to a scream. My lover's head snapped up, but even I could tell that there was no way that he could get out of the way in time, much less begin an attack of his own.

NO!!!!!

I had to do something, but there was no way that I could cover the distance between myself and the two of them in time, anymore than Kunzite-sama could dodge the attack that I knew was coming.

But I had one hand extended in Andradite-san's direction, and my own magic was surging to life. I didn't even try to control it, letting it choose its own form.

Andradite-san snarled and raised an arm to shield his eyes as I blasted him with a wind laced with scraps of something pink--flower petals? Not exactly what I'd expected, but it worked, forcing Andradite-san to abort his attack.

Kunzite-sama made a small gesture, and broad bands of energy materialized, pinning Andradite to his seat.

"I won't even bother to ask you why," my lover murmured. "Was it you all along?"

Andradite-san nodded. "You must admit that Nephrite would be better off dead than ruling anything."

Kunzite-sama shrugged. "Granted. Zoi-chan?"

"Yes, Kunzite-sama?" I moved closer to the immobile tableau.

My lover reached under his seat and pulled out a familiar box. Opening it, he offered me the sacrificial knife that I'd seen him use many times.

I looked from it to the man pinned to the chair. "You can't be serious."

"You need his energy more than I do, right now," Kunzite-sama said. "Take it, Zoi-chan."

I accepted the knife, but paused and gave Andradite-san a good, long look in the eye.

"I am going to ask why," I said.

Andradite-san offered me a crooked smile. "Because I've been second for far too long, and because it looked to me like your precious Kunzite's judgment was beginning to erode. Actually, the fact that you had to save him from me confirms that, in my eyes. Still, I would have been a lot happier if I'd succeeded in taking out that snake Nephrite and his toady first. You seem to be almost worthy of becoming a King, but that auburn-haired idiot couldn't supervise a latrine-cleaning detail properly, and Jadeite isn't much better."

I nodded, lips pressed tightly together. Andradite-san, still smiling in that peculiar way of his, tilted his head back to expose his throat.

"Take good care of my legion, Zoisite-san," he said.

I struck as quickly and precisely as I could. Despite what Andradite-san had done, I felt he was still worthy of my respect, and thus deserved a quick death.

His blood was brown, the rich colour of cloves, and appropriately enough, it tasted spicy when I bent to drink. It wasn't revolting the way human blood had been, and I found myself sucking it, and the power that accompanied it, in eagerly. Andradite-san's life energy filled me up, and I could feel my powers expanding as it did so.

Eventually, I was forced to lift my mouth away, gasping for breath. I had to touch my head to make sure that it hadn't swollen up to four times its normal size.

"Good. That means that you probably have enough power now to let you survive in your new position until you learn some finesse." Kunzite-sama was smiling at me.

"My . . . new position?" For a moment I didn't understand. Then it hit me. I'm the Fourth King of the Dark Kingdom now. Oh, my . . .

"Of course," Kunzite-sama added, "tradition requires me to divide Andradite's troops up among the surviving Kings, including you. Hmmm. I know Andradite had a couple of truly hopeless squads of duffers in there somewhere--I'll inflict them on Nephrite and Jadeite, I think."

"Do whatever you want," I said. I didn't really care. Now that I'd had a few moments to recover, there was fire in my blood, and I knew that I wouldn't have any attention to spare for administrative details until I'd satisfied the desires that were now coming to the fore.

I ripped most of my clothes to shreds getting them off, and Kunzite-sama's didn't fare much better, but he didn't seem to care, and I know I didn't.

"We're going to have to put a bed in the feeding room, you know," he said at an unexpected moment, making me laugh.


Being a King isn't easy. Especially not when the first task of your new reign is confronting Nephrite and Jadeite.

I wore the dark grey uniform proudly as I took my seat at the table. Kunzite-sama still sat at the head, his face looking like it had been carved from stone. I didn't blame him. He was going to have to apologize, or as close as he ever came, to Nephrite. I don't know if I would have had the courage to do it, in his place.

Predictably, the first thing that the auburn-haired man did upon entering the room was sneer at the two of us. "You've gone too far this time, Kunzite." Not exactly an auspicious beginning, I knew.

Kunzite-sama's eyes flared blue-white, and he was on his feet. "I am still the First King, Nephrite, and while I retain that title, you will speak to me with respect!"

"Perhaps you should not keep the title any longer then!"

Kunzite-sama smiled lazily. "And who will take it away from me? You?"

"Or Andradite-san, if he ever consents to arrive."

"I don't think that's very likely." Kunzite-sama's hand rose from under the table, and he deposited two objects there, between himself and Nephrite.

Andradite's epaulettes glittered gold and red against the dark substance of the table top.

Kunzite-sama's smile became even odder, almost as though it hurt, as he added, "Did you really think I'd had the audacity to create a fifth King? Even my position isn't secure enough to permit me to go against Metallia's will that way."

Nephrite scooped the epaulettes up off the table and pinned them to the shoulders of his uniform. He got the second one on crooked, but I didn't say anything. Instead, I favored him with a lazy smile almost worthy of Kunzite-sama.

"Tell me, Nephrite-san," my lover and mentor said when the auburn-haired King was finished, "does your challenge still stand?"

Nephrite lowered his eyes. "No, Kunzite-san."

"Good. Then perhaps we can get on with business . . ."

After that I drifted off into my own imagination until Kunzite-sama kicked me under the table.


The humans say that you can't ever go home again. And you know, it's true.

Four years after I had left, I found myself in charge of the invasion of my home village, back in the human world, watching dry-eyed as the youma pillaged and burned the town. I had no interest in the people who were being killed. They'd hated me while I'd been growing up here--well, then, let them pay the price.

I tossed my head, flinging my long hair back over my shoulder, then strolled down into the burning streets, protected by a bubble of magic. I found myself staring around with an odd kind of wide-eyed wonder at the buildings that were disintegrating all around me. It was so very, very strange. I'd been so powerless when I'd lived here, and now I had the ability to destroy all of this . . .

My mother and I had lived in an old ramshackle building that leaned against the back of the cobbler's shop. I'd spent fourteen years of my life there, until she'd brought me to my father's attention and he'd sent me to the seminary. Now it was in flames, like all the rest.

I stepped over the pile of debris lying in the doorway and entered. It wasn't much more than a hut, really, a wooden lean-to with only one room.

My mother's body lay next to the hearth. Her throat had been cut, and her hair had been matted to the dirt floor by the blood that had pooled under her head, now dry. I just stood there, staring at the body, until the roof almost caved in on my head and I realized that I had to leave.

Shouldn't I be feeling something? I wondered as I stepped out the door. She was my mother. I came out of that body, once upon a time. Or my original body had come from that one . . . Was that why I felt so detached? Because I was a demon now? No, it couldn't be that simple. Changes in personality are never brought about by just one thing, just one incident--they're the result of an accumulation of events. I had changed a lot when Nephrite had stolen me, changed a lot more when I had become Kunzite-sama's lover, changed again when I had become a demon and when I had become a King. I'd been a boy when I had left here. I was a man now, even though I looked no older. Well, if the term man can be applied to a demon king.

Saku and Hikisaku emerged from the smoke to flank me as I strode back up the street. Kunzite-sama had lent me these two experienced demons to guard and assist me while I learned how to command my new legion. They were male twins, apparently of a racial background similar to Andradite-san's. I wasn't quite sure whether they'd been identical originally, or whether they'd chosen that when they'd been given their new bodies, but they were certainly ornamental. I think that's why Kunzite-sama chose them, actually. He still liked to see me surrounded by beautiful things.

I gestured for the twins to fall in behind me as I strode up the main street to where the keep perched on top of its hill, dominating the town. My father's keep. Its roofs were smoking just like the rest, but I'd ordered that the building not be allowed to become too damaged. I'd also ordered that the duke and his heir, if any, were to be kept alive until I could speak to them.

I had a score to settle with my father.

The two huge oak doors that would normally have sealed the main gate had been broken, and the fragments dangled loosely from the hinges, and the debris in the courtyard inside were still smoldering. It all looked wonderfully strange. The courtyard had been thickly populated the only other time I'd been here. Now it was almost deserted, except for the defenders' corpses and a couple of youma that were looting them. I ignored that. It wasn't as though the dead bodies would have any further use for their valuables. Not that there was much that the youma could do with them, either, but it kept them occupied and out of the way.

That's the main problem with commanding youma, actually. You have to keep them occupied, and you have to make sure that whatever you want them to do isn't too difficult for them. That means that almost all intellectual activities are off-limits, and you have to devise new and creative menial tasks for them. I happen to know that Nephrite has a half-dozen squads in his legion that spend most of their time pounding big rocks into little rocks, and so on, until they've reduced the stuff into powder. (The powder is then mixed with water to make a paste, which becomes rock again, or as good as, when it dries, so that the youma can go back to pounding it into abeyance, but they're not bright enough to figure that out.)

But I wasn't thinking about that as I strode through the several doors and up the handful of stairs necessary to get me to the great hall of my father's keep. Actually, I wasn't thinking about much of anything. I knew that what I was about to do was necessary, somehow, but I didn't understand why, or what it was supposed to do for me.

I seated myself in the big chair on the dais, not quite the throne, that dominated the room. Traditionally, this would have been my father's place, but it was only just that he had been forced to yield it to me. After all, this was Europe, where inheritances were supposed to pass to the eldest son, regardless of merit.

My languid hand-wave was worthy of Nephrite himself. The man might not have mastered many other arts, but he did languid very well.

"Bring in the prisoners," I ordered. Saku and Hikisaku sprang to obey. I stifled a giggle. They really were adorable when they did that.

But when the prisoners finally did arrive, I almost accused the two demons of duplicity. Surely these two couldn't be my father and my brother, not this balding old man and this stripling boy with the broken nose! Then I took a closer look, and saw that both of them had intensely green eyes, although we had no other physical features in common.

I rose from my feet and stepped down from the dais. The moment I did it, I knew it had been a mistake. Without the extra boost that the high seat gave me, I was the shortest person here. Still, just ordering the demons to torture them held no real appeal.

Vengeance is a very personal thing.

The boy gave me a rather blank look, full of hatred but no real recognition, so I reached out and twisted his swollen nose. He yelped and tried to jerk his head back, but Saku was holding him securely.

"Hello, Michael," I purred. "What's the matter? Have you forgotten your big brother? Well, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. We only met the once."

I strolled over to my father before my brother could say anything. I didn't say anything to him at all, just stared deep into his eyes until he flinched.

"John, why are you doing this?" It was barely more than a whisper.

I slapped him across the face. "You will address me as King Zoisite."

But then I turned away from him. Why was I doing this? What was it supposed to accomplish? I should have been enjoying it, I knew. Any other demon would have been. But there was a part of me that still wasn't quite properly demonic. I didn't glory in cruelty, although I wasn't disturbed by it either. But because I didn't enjoy it, I had to be twice as sadistic as the other Kings. Otherwise, Nephrite might come to suspect that there was something wrong with me, and he would just love to exploit what he'd consider to be a weakness.

Nephrite. Now, there was someone that I hated. My father and my brother were just fools who had tried to force me into a role that didn't fit. Nephrite, on the other hand, had intended me to be part of a deliberate campaign against Kunzite- sama. I could forgive the pain that the auburn-haired King had caused me, but I could never forgive him for attacking the one I loved. Oh, I had the most incredible series of tortures planned for Nephrite. And that, I would enjoy.

I glanced back at my father--a pitiful, gray-haired, balding, filthy, lice-ridden human, bearded and paunchy, his teeth half rotted away--and thought, There is no relationship between this creature and myself, not anymore. Taking his castle away from him, killing the people under his protection . . . that should be enough revenge. He isn't worth wasting any more time on. And "wasting" was the word. Kunzite-sama had warned me that diverting troops away from the main campaigns, against the Earth Kingdom in the East, probably wasn't the best thing to do, even though taking this primitive, magicless keep had been, as the humans would eventually come to say, a piece of cake.

"Let them go," I ordered the demons. They stared at me expressionlessly, and did nothing. "Well, give them to the youma, then," I amended. "I don't need them."

I didn't stay to watch while Saku and Hikisaku dragged my surviving human relatives out of the room. Instead, I went out a side door that led to a little garden courtyard. There was a little, stunted cherry tree in the middle. Small though it was, the warm spring weather had made it put out a profusion of blooms.

I love cherry blossoms. I've loved them ever since I was a child, although I've never quite understood why. Still, I smiled as one drifted across the courtyard to rest in the palm of my hand.

Then strong arms wrapped around me from behind, and a familiar and beloved voice whispered, "Are you done here yet?" in my ear. My smile widened as Kunzite-sama lifted my ponytail out of the way, and his lips brushed the nape of my neck.

"I think so, yes. What's the latest word on the Moon Kingdom?" Not that I really cared. Queen Serenity was Beryl's enemy, not mine. Still, I knew the attack was coming up soon, and I was supposed to be a King, so I needed to have at least a rudimentary idea of what was going on.

Kunzite-sama nipped my ear. "Why don't I take you home and tell you all about it?"

"Oh, yes."

I melted back into his arms as he began the teleport. Yes, he would explain things to me, and then we would join in the attack. When the Moon Kingdom had been taken, the humans' resistance to the Dark Kingdom's rule would crumble, and we would become supreme. With no organized opposition left, Beryl wouldn't need as many Kings to serve under her, and I'd be able to kill that wretch Nephrite. Then there would be no one and nothing left that could possibly come between Kunzite-sama and I, no one who could possibly discover my shameful secret weaknesses.

And I understood now that my love was a weakness. I couldn't imagine living without my Kunzite-sama. Great Metallia, the emptiness inside me would be too huge to imagine . . . Still, I wasn't about to abandon that love.

Everyone needs a few weaknesses. Most of the denizens of the Dark Kingdom had a weakness for power. Mine was just a bit different, that was all. There's no harm in it, I reassured myself. None at all.

Still, I had a feeling that just thinking such things made me as big a liar as Nephrite.