No Longer the Leader
by Michaela Wills

And falling back against the roof of her new home, she sighed. That 
sigh meant a whole lot to her, I knew, it spoke volumes to me, although
no one else but I could possibly understand why. It penetrated the 
midnight air, potent with relief, satisfaction and more than anything 
else, full release.

I pursed my mouth shut. Usually, I can be more than obnoxious and she 
wouldn't appreciate my sarcasm or humor now. I sighed. If SHE were 
here, She'd knock some more sense into me. She was always the only one 
who could. Of course, She was also the one who transformed me into a 
silly little kitten again, making me positively gleeful with her 
attention, negative or positive. It would send me into antics and 
crack-up jokes that everyone would groan over, but as long as She paid 
attention, I'd never mind. And I relaxed, curling up into a comfortable
ball, head on my paws, knowing I would see HER again soon. Luna. I saw 
her tonight and she's still the same, as beautiful and witty as ever.

More than anything though, I was relieved. One of the greatest weights 
that I had tossed mercilessly onto this poor girl was lifted tonight. 
Until now, I was always in constant torment as to whether awakening her
spirit as Venus, when I did, was right. Why couldn't I have been patient,
satisfied with knowing I'd found Mina and remain a silly little white 
cat in her eyes until she was really needed?

Yet I had been impulsive that afternoon, when she crashed into me 
during her dismount at the uneven bars.  It felt like it was so 
long ago. Yet everything was okay now, I hadn't failed my mistress too 
badly, although if SHE was around . . . 

No. No, no, no, no. Don't think like that, I told myself, I can't be 
dependent on Her all the time. Even despite my rash actions so long ago
everything had turned out fine. She'd found the other senshi. She was 
no longer Sailor V, but my Venus again. Minako breathed in the night 
air contentedly, resting her hands behind her head as she rested atop 
the roof.

"Aren't they cool, Artemis?" she asked me, looking up at the stars, but
I knew who she meant. "I'm so glad we found them, and I get to meet 
them tomorrow, for real, without the heshin stuff and magic. I wasn't 
sure if it was them before, but I'm so glad . . ." She paused in 
reflection. "Artemis?"

She looked over at me, worry covering her eyes, and fear. I looked up 
at my student, my protégé, my mistress, my trainee . . . my savior.

"Yeah, Mina?"

"Can I tell them? It is okay to tell them?" her voice wavered in pain 
and uncertainty. I was surprised to say the least, what was this all 
about?

"Mina? Tell them what? I don't know what you're talking about, you said
you weren't the Princess, what else should they know?"

She sighed, looking up at the stars. Her eyes closed for a moment as 
she drank in the night. Her hair fanned around her as she 
de-transformed from her Sailor Venus form, she'd been so glad to leave 
the red, blue and white of Sailor V behind. Her sweater and jeans 
reminiscent of an ordinary teen, the wind whipped at us, reminding me of
why she wore that sweater as her hair flew around us, a curtain of gold
like her Crescent Beam attack. Golden strands that accented her 
features wonderfully. I chuckled, Venus at her finest. God, she's 
becoming a beautiful young woman, if it wasn't for Lun- . . . whoa 
Artie, don't go there! 

"I _know_ Artemis."

My ears perked at the way she said that.

"Know what, Mins?" She smiled at my private nickname for her. There is 
no way in hell she'd let me call her that before the others but . . .

"I'm supposed to be the leader of the scouts." she paused 
retrospectively as I recoiled. I'd vaguely remembered something about 
that but I was honestly unsure . . . And with my other fears about 
awakening her as Venus, I'd never dared to bring it up. It wasn't worth 
it; we'd always been alone. Just Sailor V and her white cat, Artemis.

"I remember Artemis. I didn't want to say it, but now I have. I'm the 
leader. Sailor Moon didn't exist in the Moon Kingdom, Artemis, I _know_
that, just like I know I'm the leader. I don't know how I know I 
just . . . DO, I have known. So the question is . . . who is she? And 
is she the leader now or am I?"

We sat in a moment of silence. I couldn't speak, trying to remember if 
there WAS a Sailor Moon. The thought hadn't actually crossed my mind 
before. I'd just assumed, but since Mina brought it up I was racking my 
little kitty mind.

Mars, Mercury and Jupiter seemed to accept this Sailor Moon's 
authority. And since Luna had been with them, I saw her there, that had
to mean something about Sailor Moon's credibility. Plus there was the 
evidence of the Crescent Moon Wand. It had been the symbol of 
leadership in the past . . . I knew that, although it had never 
belonged to Venus. It was the property of the one above Venus and if 
there was one thing I'd always been proud of, that stood out like a 
flagship in my mind, it was that there were very, very few superior to 
my Venus.

"Who is important enough that they'd been made to represent the Moon as
a Sailor in this time?" Mina murmured, pondering this question, 
searching her memories, as few as they were. I barely could recall the 
other scouts in uniform and our mission to defeat Beryl and find the 
Princess and I was sure (at least up until now) that my memory was more 
intact . . .

She sighed as I settled. I knew these new questions would plague us 
both until they were solved, yet we were both too tired to think 
straight tonight. We'd have to think this through another night.

"Well," I said finally to answer her earlier question, "I don't think 
so. From everything that I can remember, I would have to guess that 
Moon would be above Venus, since the Moon was the center of . . . is . . .
Of . . . Of SOMETHING." God I hated these memory lapses. "Plus, she had
the Crescent Moon Wand, which is a symbol of leadership. So I believe 
that it's safe to say that you can let her be the leader."

Another sigh followed. Yet this one deeper and much more important 
her. It suddenly occurred to me that she'd always known she had this 
responsibility that I'd just lifted. That despite the other things we 
had forgotten, she'd always just _known_ she had extra accountability 
of being a leader. The thought shocked me. All the tiny differences 
between the carefree Minako she'd been before I came to her and the 
serious one she was now made sense. I shook my head a little, trying to
comprehend what I'd just discovered about my dedicated charge. 

She had become Sailor V, the one that I knew anyhow, with the knowledge
of being a leader. It caused her to change herself. The tiny bits of 
the carefree Aino Minako that I'd noticed before awakening the Venus 
within her had been crushed under the weight of her responsibilities. 
The Mina I knew wasn't the real one. It was a Minako she created 
because she needed to be the leader.

But she wasn't the leader anymore.

So what is going to happen to the Minako that I'd learned to live 
with? The thoughtful, conscientious Mina who sometimes knew what was 
going on better than me? Would she stick around or would Mina let go 
and be who she was before? How much did her leadership responsibility 
impact her?

How much did I screw up my only charge?

Mina slipped off the roof and into her bedroom window and I for once was 
glad she didn't drag me in. I needed a good sulk. By Serenity! I'd 
messed up her whole personality with my meddling! I looked up to the 
moon that night, and prayed to everything out there that I was sure of. 
Let Mina be herself now. Let the release soothe her. Let this make up 
for all the pain I caused her, all the heartache and responsibility I 
never knew I caused her. Let this heal it, please!

I felt like crying, but it only came as a yowl and a whimper. By the 
Moon, I hated myself, for never knowing, never noticing, for causing 
her pain. It HAD to have; I knew it! My whimpering became unconsciously
louder as I wallowed in self-pity and loathing. How could I have been 
so blind! I was male, yes, but that's no excuse! I failed her, I 
failed her, I failed her!

I realized that someone was stroking my fur, holding me close. I looked
up to see Mina gently rubbing me behind my ears, stroking me warmly, 
smiling.

"Don't cry, Artsy; everything's gonna be fine now. We found the others 
and we'll find the Princess. Don't cry; we've done our jobs well so 
far. I have no regrets." She said softly as I almost chuckled through 
my tears. Count on Mins to know what's wrong with me, when I have no 
idea when she's in pain that's not physical. She was always better with
sensing emotions than me.

Artsy and Mins, what a pair. I nearly choked.

And we sat there, me taking in the moment. One of the last ones I'd 
have with this responsible Minako. Not that I minded. Mina is Mina and 
I knew I'd like the rest of her personality too, the more carefree 
parts she'd been suppressing that would slowly surface. I was eager to 
get to know the rest of her. I was sure she'd change, even if it was 
only a little or if it was a lot. And I was ready for it.

It was the end of our partnership. Tomorrow we'd join the other senshi 
for good and change ourselves permanently. I'd have my Luna back, and 
Mina would be able to release her leadership responsibilities. We'd no 
longer be a pair, but part of a team.

I couldn't wait.

@->--

Author's Notes and Disclaimer:

I don't own Aino Minako or Artemis and all rights belong to the original
author (Takeuchi Naoko) for her manga and various other companies for 
their renditions and products. I'm only using these characters for the 
enjoyment of other fans and don't mean to infringe on any copyrights, 
etc. I don't mean any ill will on the characters or their owners.

This story, fits into the first season of SM after the first appearance 
of Sailor Venus, NA Anime episode: Sailor Venus Makes the Scene; JP 
Anime episode: Saigono Sailor Senshi Venus toujou.
It's based on my theory of Mina's maturity drop between the first and 
second seasons. It answers the question of 'why?' and the questions 
asked by Artemis in this fanfic are answered in the SMR season of 
Sailormoon. So in that sense, I believe it explains itself. Please 
let me know what you think.
-Michaela