Jade Well guys, this is another story I'm writing. This is not a story that has anything to do with any of my previous works, but I have about a half an hour free and I'm going to see if I can write a story right now, so lets move on and see what I can come up with. I have no vital information you need to know right now because I have no idea what I'm going to write. I'm just working off the title I chose, "Destined Paths" and seeing if I can come up with a suitable story for it. It will probably be very short, maybe one or two pages long - about the same length of my first story - because I have so little time, and because I don't really feel like writing a really long story right now, so don't beat me over the head with that, alright? Many thanks to all of you out there who have writen me on any of my previous stories. ^_^ And now, I'm going to start writing before I run out of time. I hope you like this minna. Minna? Hey, guys! You still there? Hmm... guess they ran off. Well, I hope you readers who stayed enjoyed this then. Later! Read on. Destined Paths By: Jade It's so warm here. So warm and pleasing.. almost enchanting. I feel as if I'm floating... floating in a dream. And it is a dream. A dream come true. One of the few of mine that has, literally. Because I have thought, hoped, and longed for this moment almost every minute of every day for the past three or four months.. or maybe longer. Since all of this began. From the beginning, when it all started. How long ago again? I was just a normal girl... a whiny, worrysome, teenager, just like all of my friends. Like all the girls my age with incredible dreams and even more incredible plans for the future... Until I met a little black cat named Luna witha crescent moon on her head, and saved her from three tormenting boys.. and my life got shot to Hell. Funny how such kindess can be rewarded with such pain sometimes, huh? Come on. I mean, do you honestly think that I *enjoy* being Sailor Moon? That I enjoy putting myself in danger and risking certain death every day? That I actually *like* having to fight youma's and demons from the Negaverse when there are thousands of other things I would rather be doing? No. I would much prefer that I was at home watching t.v... or playing video games.. or reading Manga... or - I really must be desperate to say this - maybe even studying. Yes, it's true, as some of you may have already guessed, I do not *enjoy* being Sailor Moon at all. No, not in the least. And as hard as it may be for some of you to accept, I do wish I had never *met* Luna and that I had never *become* Sailor Moon to begin with. To be a famous heroine.... that was my dream from long ago, an original one from my early childhood that became more than a dream over time. It turned into a wish. And it is one that actually came true... far sooner than I had thought. Sometimes things you dream of, things you want and desire, don't turn out exactly the way you think they will. Hence the phrase; be careful what you wish for. Things would have been so much easier if I hadn't run into Luna that day... or she hadn't given me my transformation locket... or I hadn't took it from her...or really anything to upset the events that took place on that particular day. And don't get me wrong. I mea, don't think bad of me for this, and don't think that I would easily give up the friends that I have because of Sailor Moon just like that, without even some serious thinking... it's just that things were so much simpler before I became the famous super heroine that I am. This is the only completely selfish thing I've ever wanted. To be normal. And, I'm afraid, that is one dream I can wish for forever. For an eternity or longer.. and it will never happem. Believe me, I know. ..A heroine... a super hero... a fighter and a warrior.... me? Now *that's* a laugh. I was so idealistic back then... so open and free, my future was bright and I had many dreams for the time up ahead that I had thought I might actually achieve if I tried. That is, until I became a sailor scout and a whole new load of responsibilities was dropped on my shoulders, crushing them and making me realize the harsh reality that is my life. How could I ever accomplish anything in life while having to run out and destroy bad guys every other minute? I can just see myself now, standing in some office, talking to my boss some six or seven years in the future, when my communciator suddenly goes off and I have to ask, "Excuse me sir, but I really have to go out and save the world from total destruction right now. Just wait right here. This'll only take second." Yeah right. So much for *that* job. Dammit.... I could barely handle things as they were *before*, and now *this*? Why did my life have to become so... complicated. I'm sure you can probably understand that I'm pretty angry with this whole dumb situation. Who ever heard of a super hero who threw frisbee's at people anyway? Hmmm.... What was the exact date that I first transformed into Sailor Moon? I can't really remember. It was the day I first bumped into Darien... and the day I failed that math test.... well, that doesn't really narrow it down a whole lot... but it was my first fight ever with a youma... and I still can't recall the real date. Was it a month ago? Two months ago? Three? Four? It seems like a whole lot longer to me.... and to think, I'm going to be doing this for the rest of my life! So much for a bright future! Everyday I go on being Sailor Moon it seems like a year of my life has just disappeared, and every week I go on acting like the warrior I'm not, the warrior I never wanted to be, is like changing seconds into hours and hours into days. Because things just seem to get longer and more drawn out with every fight I participate in and all of my energy and zest for life are fading, hazing in and out of reality more and more with each tiara attack that I throw. And that is because, if you haven't figured it out by now, everyday of my life is like Hell. Literally. To me it feels as though the devil himself has taken over my life and is determined to ruin it totally and completely. And he's doing a damn good job too. Do you know how much I wish things could be different? Do you *know* how much I wish things would just end right now and go back to the way they were, *before* I ever heard about Sailor Moon and the rest of the scouts? How much I would give up just to be just plain old Serena? Do you? Does anyone? No. No one does, and no one ever will. Because no one understands. *No one*. I fight everyday for love, and justice, for joy and happiness for others, for love, as the sailor scout Sailor Moon, and each day my life becomes darker, and darker. What ever happened to my happiness? Has anyone ever thought of that? Huh? Everyday I destroy youma's, evil creatures from the Negaverse, generals, or just plain bad guys all in the name of justice. And everyday my life becomes more and more unbearable. Before I met Luna, I couldn't hurt a fly, but now that I am destined to be a sailor scout, the *leader* of them, to search for the Moon princess and to one day serve her.... because of that destiny and that duty I must kill, no..... *murder* youma's and evil creatures everyday. So what does that make me? Does it make me a *real* murder, like all the ones that are locked up in prison cells, behind bars. Or does it make me a fighter for the good and innocent? A super hero with incredible power? Who knows? Could anyone ever tell? Hitler was writen down in History as an evil person who wanted to rule the wolrd with an iron fist and killed millions of Jewish people to gain his ultimate goal... and he claimed that it was all in the name of Christ, in the name of justice.. just like me... only he found a way to justify everything he did when I cannot. I have no good reason for what I do other than the fact that to everyone else it is *justice*... What I do.... what *does* that make me? Am I like him? I kill creatures every day in the name of peace and justice... so am I Hitler to the Earth now? Am I? I hope to the heavens that that isn't so. Now, some may argue that because youma's are evil, they deserve it and that their lives are probably better ended anyway. It certainly may look that way, but what if those youma's never *chose* to be evil? What if they were really good on the inside but were only youma's because that's what they were created to be? Because that's what they were born as? Because it's their nature, and they can't fight it? Huh? What then? Do you know? Does anyone? No, yet again. And do you know why? Because they've never experienced the feeling of being trapped by who and what you are. But I know what those pitiful youma's are going through, because I've been there. And I pity them, the lives they live... who they are. I know exactly what it's like to be trapped by destiny, because I am, and shall always be, until death takes over and my destiny fades with it. My feelings of being trapped and closed in are deep and disturbing and many others would dispute the fact that I am capable of experiencing such depth either in thought or emotion, but I know differently. I know that I am capable of so much more than anyone knows, and I very much wish to show everyone that I'm not as dumb as they think I am; but how can I? Everyone thinks of me as a pathetic, whiny teenager, nothing more and nothing less and it would take far more effort than I'm willing to give to convince everyone that I'm not who they think I am. I snuggle into the warmth that surrounds me slightly, trying to make the chill in my body go away. I feel very cold and very bitter right now. And I don't feel a whole lot these days besides bitterness, so what I do feel I always follow or act on. Many times this new 'go with your feelings' attitude of mine has saved me from certain death in a fight, because I follow my instincts and have avoided many fatal hits from strong oponents by doing this. Sometimes when life seems at it's lowest and when I think things can't get any worse, I wish that I'd never avoided the hits that would have destroyed me so easily.. but then of course, things get much worse and much more complicated, and I have to push aside such thoughts for later. *Much* later. People often say I'm a strange person and that I can be very confusing, and you know what; they're right! No one understands me, and I certainly don't! Why do I cling to this empty shell I used to call a life? Why not just let a Youma destroy me in a battle and end this miserable existense? Why don't I just kill myself now and get it over with? Why wait until someone else does it? I feel the arms around me shift and then strong fingers flex and my position tilts so that I can be lowered to the ground. My feet hit the grass softly and I step away from my savior with a dull sense of loss, looking up into his mask, and seeing faint blue eyes behind it. I nearly smile at such a feeble disguise... not that mine's much better though, although the magic does help. If he honestly thinks that that mask is going to keep anyone from finding out who really is behind that cape and top hat he's even more crazy than I am! Yes, I know who Tuxedo Mask is. I'm not stupid you know! Some people may think so, but it's not true. Yes, I know that Darien is the person who saves me from death almost every day, and yes I know that Darien is also the boy who teases me to no end every time we meet. That's what makes it such a good disguise from other people.. his cold nature. But it's not good enough for me, who knows him better than anyone else around.. I think. My costume doesn't really hide who I am from the public either, but I have something else up my sleeve. You see, over time I began to wonder how it was that Molly and my friends, who knew me far better than I did Darien, could not recognize me as Sailor Moon when really all I did was change clothes. And once a little while ago, when I was thinking about it, I asked Luna why this was, and she told me that the gem in my tiara spreads a magical field around me and conceals who I am from anyone who might figure it out. The only way one could really figure out my secret identity is if they saw me transform in front of them. I was surprised at this, but it did make sense. After all, the other scouts had tiara's as well, but they never used them aside from Jupiter and her thunder, so it seemed like a good idea that the tiara should be what protects us from prying eyes. Like I said, I'm not as dumb as I look or act. Tuxedo Mask on the other hand, doesn't appear to have one of those magical shields that protects him from others finding out who he is. I can see right through his disguise like nothing. Maybe it's the fact that *I* have a magical field around me that has something to do with it.... But either way, no one else seems to have noticed who Tuxedo Mask really is, and I'm not ready to tell the scouts yet... I think I'd rather leave them in the dark. So many people often do that to me and it feels good to have the upper hand this time. I sigh and turn from him, my savior, my knight... my love. Yes, I do love Tuxedo Mask as well.. and I suppose that means that I love Darien. Such a strange thought really, to love someone who can be so annoying... but since it's true, and I know it's true, I choose to accept the facts and go about a though nothing were different. If only I could do that with Sailor Moon... I sigh again. It really wouldn't do for him to suspect that I knew who he was. He might get angry, or defensive... and I don't want that. I want to gain his trust first and that may be hard enough as things are now without something else added on. Slowly turning I move back towards the battle that is going on in front of me and brush by Tuxedo Mask as I do. He stares at me as though I'm some sort of ethereal princess, or new born goddess as I walk by and I can't help but imagine what it would be like if he really did think that. Sighing again I pull off my tiara and prepare to lose even more of myself to this war of light and dark. Of love and hate. I must return to my fading little life and continue with it as I always do, as though nothing were different. As though nothing were wrong. Nothing wrong indeed. I shake my head and throw my tiara into the fight, Tuxedo Mask following me, throwing in a barrage of roses. Here we go again.... Continuing on our destined paths. ------------------------------------------------------------ *sigh* Not very good, I know, but it's the best I could come up with because now I have to go and e-mail some people about their stories and it's nearly 3:30 in the afternoon on Thursday. I have no idea why I wrote this, so don't ask. Feel free to write anytime guys, and I apologize for the length of this story and lack of really any plot or anything. At least this was longer than I originally thought it was going to be. And for any of you who are wondering, yes, this is in the first season before Serena knows that she is the Moon Princess. Just to let you know, this story takes place in aproximately one minute worth of time. I just put in a lot of detail and thought from Serena to make it longer and I have read stories like this before, ones that happen in a few moments or something, and wanted to try one, so here it is. Again, gomen for anyone who was looking for lots of emotion or action. This one didn't really work out that way. Please write me and tell me what you thought of the story. I don't really like this but I just wrote it on a whim and decided to send it in. Sayonora for now guys! - Jade