(Readers advisory: Due to extremely foul language, the following story has been rated "R" by the author.) Sailor Moon / Bubblegum Crisis By Chris Davies "Best of All The Years" Episode 1 I'm not exactly sure how I got talked into being the celebrity judge at the karaoke contest that Ronnie threw to celebrate the grand reopening of his place. I mean, of all the people in the business that Ronnie knew, there must've been someone who fit the profile a little better than me. I hate karaoke. Of all the weird stuff the twentieth century came up with, that has got to be the weirdest. Okay, maybe that and bungee jumping. But I owed Ronnie -- he'd been one of the first to give a certain newly formed group called "The Batty Bunch" (yeah, it was corny ... changing it to "The Replicants" was probably one of the smartest moves I ever made) a break. And I pay what I owe. And I figured it wasn't so bad -- I mean, it wasn't like I was going to have to listen to Nene do karaoke. "And now, ladies and gentlemen, our VERY special celebrity judge for this evening, a face and a voice that is no stranger to the Ronper Room! The Reigning Queen of Retrothrash, Priss Asagiri!" A brief moment to shoot my wad of gum into my hand, and I strolled onto the stage, to scattered applause and wolf whistles. `Yeah, in your dreams,' I silently informed the whistlers. "Ladies ... and gentlemen, if such endangered species are to be found in this hole ... thank you for your applause. But it ain't me who deserves it, no, it's you people. You, who are brave enough to stand up and court complete humiliation in a karaoke contest. My hat goes off to you." I lifted my wig. "It ain't right for you to have to go through that without having seen at least one of your judges sing along to a melody written before she was born. So, here's "Everything Louder than Everything Else" as recorded by His Hugeness!" I know that I will never be politically correct. An' I don't give a damn about my lack of etiquette. As far as I'm concerned the world could still be flat. And if the thrill is gone, then it's time to take it back! And if the thrill is gone, then it's time to take it back! I scanned the crowd as I sang the next two verses over the CD accompaniment -- there was the usual mixture of the walking wounded and the living dead who make up the barfly population, a number of retrothrash wannabe's (Consider that image -- people who want to get in on a trend that prizes style over substance, who have no style. Boggles the mind.) and an unusually large number, for this neighborhood, of Megatokyo's solid citizens. You know the type. The "just following orders" type. God, I hated them. And where the hell was Linna? She'd said she was going to show up to give me moral support ... maybe her class was running late. And I ain't in it for the power, And I ain't in it for my health, I ain't in it for the glory of anything at all, And I sure ain't in it for the wealth! But I'm in it 'til it's over and I just can't stop. If you wanna get it done, You've gotta do it yourself, And I like my music like I my life, Everything louder than everything else! Everything louder than everything else! Everything louder than everything else! Man, what a song. I mean, most of the stuff that came out of that period is just plain crappy ... but some of it was pure gold. Yeah, the fact that it described my loosely defined philosophy perfectly didn't hurt either. All it needed was a few references to a certain company whose name rhymed with venom and the immediate need to destroy said company, and it'd be perfect. And maybe a slam of overly perky hackers. They say I'm wild and reckless, I should be acting my age, I'm an impressionable child in a tumultuous world, And they say I'm at a difficult stage. But it seems to me to the contrary, Of all the crap they're going to put on the page, That a wasted youth is better by far Than a wise and productive old age! Wasted youth is better by far Than a wise and productive old age! &c. And so on, and so forth, 'til the end. Applause, even some cheering. No fruit. I slid the mic back into its stand, and trotted down to the judges' table. "Was that bit about humiliation necessary, Priss?" Ronnie hissed in my ear. I lit up. Clenching the cigarette in my teeth, I grinned, and whispered, "Yes." First contestant, some girl named Hino Rei. Crazy traditionalists. Why not just give her a nice normal name like "Raye"? She was going to be singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart". Weird coincidence. My song and hers were written by the same guy. I scanned the lyrics. Not really as impressive, more an "oh, I need him so badly" type song ... She walked up to the mic slowly and gravely. Her hair was dark like the night, and her eyes were not much lighter. She was tall for a woman of Japan ... hell, for a woman of anywhere ... and dressed in a red gown. No, not so much a gown as a ... cloak. A cloak that covered her upper body, clasped at the throat. She stood before the mic, head bowed, as the short introductory music played. As the first softly whispered "Turn around" came off of the sound track, she lifted her head and began to sing. (Turn around) Every now and then I get a little bit lonely And you're never coming round. (Turn around) Every now and then I get a little bit tired Of listening to the sound of my tears. (Turn around) Every now and then I get a little bit nervous That the best of all the years have gone by. (Turn around) Every now and then I get a little bit terrified And then I see the look in your eyes. (Turn around, bright eyes) Every now and then I fall apart. (Turn around, bright eyes) Every now and then I fall apart. And I need you now, tonight. And I need you more than ever. And if you'll only hold me tight, We'll be holding on forever. And we'll only be making it right, Cause we'll never be wrong together. Once upon a time I was falling in love, Now I'm only falling apart ... Nothing I can do, For total eclipse of the heart. She sang with a quiet, desperate intensity. She had a beautiful voice. In a kinder world, she might have wound up as an opera diva. As it was, she'd probably wind up as some recording corp's flavor of the month. (Turn around) Every now and then I know You'll never be the one you've always wanted to be. (Turn around) Every now and then I know You'll always be the only one who wanted me the way that I am. (Turn around) Every now and then I know There's no one in the universe as magical or wondrous as you. (Turn around) Every now and then I know There's nothing any better; There's nothing that I just wouldn't do. (Turn around, bright eyes) Every now and then I fall apart! (Turn around, bright eyes) Every now and then I fall apart! And I need you now, tonight. Wait a minute. I checked the lyric sheet. In the first two verses of the stanza, where she'd sung "the one", they listed "the boy". Weird. And we'll only be making it right, Cause we'll never be wrong Together we can take it to the edge of the night. Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time. I dunno what to do, I'm always in the dark, We're living in a powderkeg and giving off sparks! I really need you tonight, Forever's gonna start tonight! Forever's gonna start tonight! Once upon a time I was falling in love, Now I'm only falling apart. Nothing I can do, for total eclipse of the heart. Once upon a time there was light in my life, Now there's only love in the dark. Nothing I can say, but total eclipse of the heart. A great song, even if she did mess with the words a bit. A great song, and one hell of a singer. I started to clap ... I felt a pinprick under my shoulder ... And then ... I was floating in a clear liquid, staring out at a weird, surreal world. The only thing that looked like anything was something like a distorted human face, fairly close to mine, underneath a mess of blue something-or-other. My brain realized I was in a liquid, and told the rest of me. I clamped my open mouth shut, and started to thrash. I wanted to get a hand up to my nose, but I didn't have any room to maneuver -- my universe turned rigid about an inch above my nose and a couple more to either side of my hips (at that point I realized I had no clothes on). A voice penetrated my panic. "She's come awake! Get her out of there, now!" High voice, very probably female. The distorted face shifted with the voice. Maybe it was the source ... Something cushioned the back of me. A light shone above my head, and I began to move upwards ... or at least towards the light. My face cleared the liquid, and I felt it start to flow out of my nose, and I gagged, trying to get it out of my mouth and throat. It tasted worse coming up than it had going down. My eyes were too blurry to see anything clearly, just lights, and motion. My ears, on the other hand, were fine. I heard little snatches of conversation ... "So who is she?" "Some twenty-first rocker." "Why do we have to decant ..." "Orders from the palace ..." A head interposed itself between my face and the lights. "Ms. Asagiri? The device I'm placing on your face is going to remove the substance from your nose and mouth. Please do not panic." That voice was the same one that had ordered me out of there. Wherever there was. Something clamped on my face, forcing my mouth open. I felt suction in my nostrils and throat. The "substance" flowed up and out. My eyes had begun to clear up. I could see the woman who was operating the device now. She had bluish-black hair. It was likely that she had been the face. Which meant that the face had been the source of the voice. Good deduction, Priss. The suction had been drawing nothing but air for a minute. She removed the device. "Now, do you remember who you are?" Oh yes I did. I was somebody's captive. NO GODDAMN WAY. I surged up, and slammed a fist into the woman's face. She fell back with a startled cry. Before I could do anything more, a bunch of people piled onto me. I screamed, I swore, I lashed out, and I was pinned. I heard the voice, a lot harder, say, "Sedate her." I felt a pinprick under my shoulder ... And I was laying on a bed, my hands firmly manacled on either side of it. It was a comfortable bed, and a nice room. A pair of chairs were beside the bed, and a large picture window showed a clear, blue sky and a bright sun. The place was much more comfortable than any the Megatokyo jails had ever offered me, but the fact remained that I was a captive. I don't deal with captivity well. After screaming myself hoarse for an hour, I finally quieted down. Like magic, a door opened on the far side of the room. In stepped in the tallest woman I've ever seen. She was just a shade under seven feet tall, with auburn hair tied back in a waist length ponytail. She wore a sleeveless, skintight white garment, a green metal breastplate, a green mini-skirt, a pair of green high heeled boots, and white gloves. At her waist she carried a sword. I took a long look at that sword. It was like a scimitar, but even though it didn't look like it was a vibrating blade, it still seemed to be the sharpest thing I'd ever seen ... "Are you going to behave?" she asked, in a quiet yet husky voice. "Maybe," I answered cautiously. Caution is always indicated when dealing with an amazon who might run you through at a moment's notice. She let out a weary sigh. "I'll put it like this. If you behave, you'll get some answers. If you don't behave, I'm going to close this door, and come back tomorrow with the same question. Let me make this clear. I don't like you very much. You gave one of my best friends a black eye yesterday, after she'd gone through a hell of a lot to bring you to life. If you don't want to behave, fine. It means I don't have to look at you." I'd been under for a whole day? "I'll behave," I said suddenly. She stepped back into the corridor beyond the door, and spoke too softly for me to hear to someone standing out of sight. Then she came forward, stepping aside from the doorway. The woman who entered then was not quite as tall as her bodyguard (that much, at least, I could guess from their body language). She had long, golden-blonde hair that was gathered up in two long braids that stretched to her ankles behind her. Her deep blue eyes were filled with compassion and trust. She was dressed in a large gown that looked like it was intended for a formal dance. "Greetings, Ms. Asagiri. I am Queen Serenity. I bid you welcome to Crystal Tokyo." She moved gracefully to sit down in one of the chairs. The tall woman stood behind her, never taking her eyes from me, or her hand from her sword. "I apologize for the restraints, but Lady Jupiter insists. She is frightfully put out by what you did to Lady Mercury." "Lady Jupiter being ... her, right?" I asked, making a head gesture to the amazon. Serenity nodded. "I have learned, the hard way, to take her advice in such matters. It is a terrible thing to have to learn things the hard way, do you not agree?" She seemed not to notice the fact that I pointedly ignored the question. "Now, Lady Jupiter stated that you would be given answers. What questions trouble you the most?" "Well, for starters, where the hell am I?" "A more complicated question than you realize, I think. As I said, you are in Crystal Tokyo. However, as you have never heard of Crystal Tokyo this is not actually an ..." "I've heard of Tokyo. Or Megatokyo. I live there. The sky there is never like that, though," I interrupted, making another head gesture, at the window. "The two cities are related ... Tokyo has gone through so many name changes ... Tokyo, Megatokyo, Neo Tokyo, Scrap Iron City ... I believe our naming manages to capture the spirit of all of them, however." She sighed. "Perhaps the simplest way to explain what has happened to you is to make it quite clear to you when you are. What date do you think it is?" "I dunno ... it was August of 2033, last time I checked ..." "You are incorrect by nearly nine hundred years." "You people think that it's 1133?" "No, Ms. Asagiri. We are in the first third of the thirtieth century of the Christian reckoning." It took a long moment for that to sink in. "Wha ... what ... how ... how is this ..." "I must explain a great deal, Ms. Asagiri. Which would you rather have explained, the method by which you have come to be here in this time, or the reasons that you are here?" "BOTH." "Very well. This may confuse you, Ms. Asagiri. Put simply, you are not, in the truest sense possible, Priscilla S. Asagiri, "retrothrash" musician and member of the Knight Sabers. Under our law, a clone is not considered to be a "reincarnation" of a person, but a separate being. If Priscilla Asagiri ..." "Hold it. HOLD IT." She paused. "Knight Sabers?" I said, deciding to tackle the easiest part first. "I don't know what you're talking about." "Ms. Asagiri, there is no need to dissemble. We are aware of her career as a mercenary vigilante. Remember that nearly a thousand years have passed since the days you remember ... now, as I was saying ..." "What happened?" "I beg your pardon?" "I'm a clone? So what happened to the original ..." I can't bear to say, `the original me'. "That is not clear. History records that the Knight Sabers dropped out of sight in the early 2040s, around the time of the destruction of GENOM ..." "We won ... that's something at least ..." "It certainly is implied that they may have played a major role in the corporation's downfall," Serenity agreed. "There is a memorial to them on the palace grounds, perhaps you would care to visit it at some time in the future." "Yeah, right." She shrugged. "As you wish. In any case, you'd no doubt like to learn the reasons for your revival." "Damn straight!" "To begin with ... your last memories are of a certain karaoke competition, are they not?" "Yeah ..." "An individual using the name Rei Hino performed there. She is ... or was, rather ... one of my allies, Lady Mars. At that time, we were only beginning the steps that would eventually lead to the foundation of our city. Especially important among these early steps was the collection of genetic material of various individuals whom we decided would be of importance in the future. Lady Mars was greatly impressed with Priss Asagiri's singing ability and musical talent." "So you stole my DNA." The pinprick ... "Essentially, yes. Some time thereafter, when we became aware of her other career, it was clear that you would be of great use to our realm in a military capacity. There are very few individuals in our genetic library who have as much experience in guerrilla warfare as Priscilla Asagiri." "So I've been drafted," I muttered bitterly. Serenity shook her head. "No, in point of fact you have not. You have been restored to life in compliance with the final orders Lady Mars gave before she severed her alliance with us. You are free of any obligation to enter military service, Ms. Asagiri. I welcome you to the thirtieth century, and invite you to take advantage of all the benefits of our society." "Pass, thanks. If you'll just undo these handcuffs, I'll be out that window -- I assume we're a few floors up -- and out of your hair in a jiffy." "I beg your pardon?" she asked mildly. "You stole my DNA, dragged me into the future, and cloned me, you damn well better beg my pardon! I don't want to live in this world!" "So you intend suicide?" "Damn straight!" "I truly regret this, Ms. Asagiri ..." "Look, just call me Priss, all right?" "That would not be appropriate. But as I was saying, I respect an individual's right to decide whether she will live or die. Unfortunately, we cannot allow you to commit suicide. TINSTAAFL." "Gesundheit." "No, Ms. Asagiri, TINSTAAFL is one of the fundamental principles of our society. There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch. The government of Crystal Tokyo has invested a large sum of money in your preservation and revival. You owe us." The basic inanity of that statement overwhelmed me for a few moments. "I didn't ask to be brought back to life! Why should I pay for it?" "Because you benefit by it. Part and parcel of TINSTAAFL is the concept that those who benefit from something should be made to pay for it, just as those who suffer by it should be compensated." "How the hell do I benefit by being dragged back to life?!" She stared at me for a long moment. There was a tremendous sorrow in those eyes. It was impossible to look at them and not feel very, very small inside ... "Only those who have never known loss could ever ask that question, Ms. Asagiri. I would give my own life to bring back any one of the noble souls who have died in the name of the Crystal Kingdom, but my life is not mine to give. Do you truly value your life so little that you do not see its continuance as a miracle?" "I want my life on my own terms, damn it! And who the hell do you think you are, saying I don't know about loss! Do you have ANY idea what I've been put through?!! ANY?!!" "You lost your entire family in the Kanto Earthquake. When you were seventeen, your lover was killed. Within the last year of the time that your genetic material was taken, you were forced to kill a close friend, one Sylvie ..." DAMN IT DAMN IT DAMN IT. She had been damn smart to put the manacles on me because, otherwise, I'd have been strangling her at that point ... "... whom some of our historians believe may have been more than just your friend ..." "WHAT?!! What the hell do your historians spend their time doing, wanking themselves over weird fantasies about people who're dead?!" "Ms. Asagiri, that will do. You will have the opportunity to clear up any misconceptions about Priscilla Asagiri's personal history. Returning to the issue of your suicidal intent -- an implant has been made in your spinal column that will automatically alert an emergency response team if you are in danger of fatal injury. They have orders not to cease to perform resuscitation attempts under any circumstances. If need be, we will grow another clone of you to ensure that you pay your debt to society." "How am I supposed to do that? I have nothing, unless you've been compounding the interest on what was in my bank account ..." "We have not, and in addition that would not be your bank account, but that of Priscilla Asagiri ... however, you will be provided with a job suited to your skills and training, and we will garnishee a portion of your wages each month until you have cleared your balance." "I AM Priscilla Asagiri," I insisted. "Under our legal code, you are not." "I don't give a shit about your stupid laws! I AM PRISS!" "If you choose to believe so, that is your privilege. Unless you have any further questions, the time allotted for this interview is drawing closed, is it not, Lady Jupiter?" "I'm amazed you've put up with her for this long ..." the amazon grumbled. "She reminds me a great deal of Lady Mars," Serenity said, "and I have ever endured much more abusive behavior from her, have I not?" "Waitaminnit. This Lady Mars is the one who had me brought back like this?" I asked quickly. "Correct. She gave the order." "Why?" Serenity let out a long, sad-sounding sigh. "I do not know. Perhaps you should ask her." "Then bring her here, please!" The last word didn't come easily at all. "I would if I could, Ms. Asagiri. However, due to a dispute in policy, Lady Mars ended her alliance with me only a few moments after the order concerning your disposition was issued. I do not know where she is, and I would like to speak with her almost as much, I think, as you would. Good day, Ms. Asagiri. I hope that you enjoy your life. The manacles will be released when I exit the room." And then she rose up, smiled, and walked out, followed by Lady Jupiter. As the door closed behind them, the manacles opened, freeing my wrists. I got out of bed, and walked over to the window. Sure enough, I was up a few floors. I'd say at least forty. The city stretched out in all directions, buildings that looked like crystals mixing with ones of more traditional construction. Beyond the city was a huge body of water ... the ocean. In the far distance, I could see boats. It was the most beautiful cityscape I'd ever seen. God, I hated it. I backed up to give myself some running room, and slammed myself into the window. The idea was to slam *through* the window, but from the way I smashed into it, I got the feeling that I'd be broken by it before I could break it. I slid to the floor. Nine hundred years. Linna, Sylia, Nene, Mackie ... dead. Probably dust. Hell. *I* was dust. I wondered if there was anything left to bury ... I rubbed my eyes, because I realized I was crying. Nuh-uh. That's what they wanted me to do. They wanted me to start weeping in despair, to freak out, to give up. I don't give up. "You hear me, you bitch?!" I shouted. "I'm Priss Asagiri, and I don't EVER give up!" They wanted me to make my way in this screwed-up wannabe utopia on their terms. Forget it. I'd do it on MY terms. And I'd find this Mars bitch, and make her tell me why she'd dragged me out of the grave to live in this awful, beautiful city. Count on it. Sailor Moon/Bubblegum Crisis "Best of All the Years" Episode 2 [To review: Priscilla S. Asagiri, a member of the mercenary vigilantes known as the Knight Sabres, has awakened in the early thirtieth century, a "guest" of Queen Serenity of Crystal Tokyo. Her last memories are of a karaoke contest in which a certain "Hino Rei" participated, and of feeling a poke in her arm, which Serenity informs her was one of her agents collecting her DNA. Priss has been restored to life in compliance with orders given by Lady Mars (Hino Rei) just before she dissolved her alliance with Queen Serenity. She is outraged to be told that due to the expense involved in this restoration, she will not be permitted to end her life, but must rather pay back her "debt to society" in accordance with the Crystal Kingdom's policy of TINSTAAFL (There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch). Furious and grieving for her long-dead friends, Priss swears to find Lady Mars, and exact an explanation for her resurrection.] It's always the same. I'm on stage, screaming my lungs out in rage, like I had at the start of my career, before my career as a Knight Saber had taught me that a whisper could be as effective as a howl. And suddenly, I realize that I can't tell where my hand starts and my microphone begins. My hand is becoming metal. Shiny, chromed metal. I drop the mic, and I realize that the same thing is happening to my other hand. Screaming, I drop to my knees, and see that the taint is creeping up my legs ... I howl, and something is coming up my throat, it's a particle beam, oh god. I'm a boomer. And then I wake up. I've been having that nightmare since ... hell, since I can remember. Of course, selective amnesia about everything that happened before the ... quake means I don't know exactly when it started. But it only came once in a while back in the twenty-first century. In the thirtieth century, the wonderful utopia, I was having it damn near every night. I knew exactly why, of course. It was that thing on my back. I clambered out of my bed, and stomped across the small apartment I'd been allocated as part of my "integration into our society". The mirror in the "bathroom" area was dusty, but clear enough for me to see the thing when I twisted my neck around. It was small, circular, and harmless looking, the implant that would notify medical aid if my life was ever in danger of premature termination. Why the hell, if this place's technology was so goddamn advanced, couldn't they have put it inside my body? Then at least, I wouldn't have to look at it whenever I wasn't wearing any clothes around a mirror. My plan of bloody retribution was not going according to schedule. Six weeks had passed since I was dragged screaming from the abyss, weeks in which I had made zero progress towards finding Mars -- I almost never thought of her as "Rei" which was probably just some name she'd come up with on the spur of the moment for that contest. Instead, I'd found myself immersed in my "job". I was reasonably certain that it was some kind of makework position since anybody with a bit of sense could have done it. The principal means of entertainment in Crystal Tokyo was a sort of holographic television -- way more advanced than had been in use in my era. You really couldn't tell if the hologram was real or an illusion anymore ... anyway, the content of the holovision programming was mostly news and information, with not a lot of "pure" entertainment. There were adaptations of plays and novels (including a few that, if I got it right, had been written by fricking space aliens ...) but no sitcoms, cop shows, or soap-ops. Instead, the populace of Crystal Tokyo had, once a week, a two hour long variety show. Pro-entertainers from all over the world -- and a few from off-world -- did their acts for the small studio audience and for the vastly larger "remote" audience. Dancers, puppeteers, improvisational actors, storytellers, stand-up comedians (though thankfully VERY few), and -- this is where *I* come in -- musicians. I wasn't a performer, although I was asked once or twice to show off my talent. Instead, I was called in to assist the stage manager in setting the soundstage up properly for this musician or that singer. Basically, my job consisted of going through a data base of previous arrangements to find which one had suited the performer in the past, checking with him or her to see if it was appropriate this time, and making corrections if it wasn't. It was the most boring experience of my life. There were five people to do this job, which the stage manager could easily have done by herself. I wondered if the other "consultants" were cloned entertainers who had been slammed into the work force to pay for *their* medical care. Actually, I didn't wonder. The thought crossed my mind, but I didn't really give a shit. I ran my bath, and climbed in. This was just about the only really good part of my day. I could imagine what I was going to do to the bitches who'd put me in this position, and forget my troubles. The wall went ping. I sighed, and said, "Display." The wall just above the far end of the bathtub transformed into a two dimensional video screen. On the screen was a nervous looking guy, Kerropi Tsuma, one of the other "consultants", and the only one who'd made an effort to get to know me. "Aie! Priss, you're in the tub!" he exclaimed. "And you're gay. What's the problem?" "You should have just gone to audio," he lectured. "Suppose some pervert had been calling?" "I'd have welcomed the change. What are you calling me for?" Kerropi seemed to be sweating. "Well ... we aren't going to be needing you for this week's show, Priss." "Yeah?" I asked, non-committally. "Yes ... um, Lady Mercury will be giving a special presentation, and she specifically requested that you be nowhere near the complex when she was there." My jaw dropped. "You're fucking kidding me." He shook his head with a sad expression. "So because one of the hoity-toity jetset elite is condescending to appear on the show and she has a GRUDGE, I'm supposed to just take the week off without pay?!!" I was shouting. Why was I shouting? I don't LIKE working on the show ... "Oh, no! You'll be paid for the amount of work we think you'd do if you were there ... this falls under the Special Absentee Conditions Clause of your contract ..." "Save it! Fine, tell her Royal Assholyness I won't be anywhere near her ..." "You really shouldn't talk like that about the Senshi, Priss. It's not a good idea ..." He looked really nervous now. "Oh, so now they're gonna take away my freedom of speech, too?" "No, Priss, but ... a lot of people tend to regard the members of Her Majesty's court with something akin to worship. Think of the jyhads that were fought in your era! If you say that sort of thing in the wrong place, you could wind up getting lynched." I let out a long, slow, exasperated breath. "Fine, I'll watch my mouth. Was that all?" "Well ... actually there was one other thing, but maybe now's not the right ..." "SPILL IT." "Would you like to go out for lunch with me?" I stared at his image for a very long moment. "Sure," I muttered. "Why not?" "Kaleidoscopic! I'll pick you up at ..." "Forget that. Where are we eating?" "Uh, well, I thought you might like Makoto's Okonomiyaki Emporium." "Fine, whatever. I'll meet you there at two. Bye. Cancel." The wall went back to being a wall. I slumped down in the tub. Well, that meant that I had seven hours to kill before lunch, and the rest of the day free. It was time to start working on vengeance. The Crystal Tokyo Public Library was a huge building that looked like it had been carved from a single, vast crystal. I walked through the front door wondering where the security scanners were and headed for the information desk. "Good day, Citizen, how may I assist you?" the girl at the desk asked politely. "What's the going rate for library access?" I asked bluntly. If this place ran on the same logic as every other institution in the city. "Twenty cents a minute. Could I interest you in one of our special package deals ..." I was already in motion while she started asking, since I didn't have any intention of coming back here after I'd done my research today. The rate was actually pretty reasonable when you considered that libraries in Mega Tokyo usually charged about fifty thousand nuyen a month for a library card. There was a row of monitors, each with a sort of automated teller machine beside it. The monitor bid me to insert my Identicard into the slot, and place my palm on the palm-reading device. I did so. "You are Citizen Asagiri, occupational class three, current assets fifteen hundred forty eight point sixty seven socreds," a soft voice stated. "Please state your request." "I wanna see all the articles that have been written in all the local papers within the last ... eight weeks about Lady Mars." "Shall I display article titles in menu format?" "Yes," I said, trying to forget that I was probably dealing with an artificial intelligence. The articles filled up the screen, thirty two of them, and there was a little note on the bottom of the page that said, page 1 of 42. Great ... I noticed that the articles weren't organized in any way I understood. Articles from two days ago were beside ones from eight weeks back, various authors in no order ... "Hey, how are these things classified?" "Random order. You did not specify any system of classification." Oh, even better! Not just an artificial intelligence, a STUPID artificial intelligence. "Order the articles by date, beginning with the oldest ones, and then moving to the most recent." It was, however, a fast stupid AI. A moment later, the articles were in a historical order. I scanned down the first page of titles. And the second. And the third ... It was on the tenth page, about six and a half weeks before, that I found the first information. The article was entitled, "Lady Mars Quits." Apparently, there had been some kind of assassination attempt on the Queen, which Mars had foiled ... but the Queen had stopped her "ally" (that was the word that everyone used to describe her and the other three immortals who ran the place with the Queen) from summarily executing the assassin. The assassin had escaped, and Lady Mars had furiously ended her alliance with the Crystal Kingdom. She hadn't been heard from since. This made absolutely no sense to me ... Why the hell would the Queen insist that someone trying to off her be spared to the point of letting the perp run free? Her publicity office had made a statement to the effect that she was "disturbed by Lady Mars' willingness to ignore the spirit of the law in pursuit of its word," but that sounded like so much bull to me. I considered looking up the history of these two women ... but I was pretty sure that all I'd have gotten was a bunch of "official" histories that made them out like the saviors of the world, just like a certain corporation's publicity material did. Had. I was about to get my card back, when a sudden thought came to me. "Computer?" "Yes, Citizen Asagiri?" "Display all materials on the group known as the Knight Sabres." Only a single page of titles, this time, organized by publishing date ... the thing was consistent, at least. The second item was "A Journal: 2011 - 2041" by Sylia Stingray. There it was. My answer to the question, what had happened to the original version of myself ... I mean, Sylia wouldn't have not noted what happened to me, right? "The second item, please." Why was my mouth so dry? I wanted to know this, right? "I am sorry, Citizen Asagiri, but that item is currently reserved for the exclusive use of the Dean of the Department of Pre-Apocalyptic History at the University of Crystal Tokyo. I can connect you to his office, if you so request." "No, forget it ..." "Citizen Asagiri, there is a call coming from the office of the Dean of the Department of Pre-Apocalyptic History at the University of Crystal Tokyo. Time spent in conference will not be added to your account. Will you accept the call?" "Huh?" How had he known I was ... "That is not an interpretable answer, Citizen Asagiri. Will you ..." "Yes, all right, put him through!" Stupid, STUPID machines ... The Dean was a tall guy, balding and bespectacled. He was staring at me anxiously. "Well, I'll be damned. It really is you." "Were you expecting someone else?" I snapped. "I'd heard rumors, of course, but ... may I state, Ms. Asagiri, that this is a great honor?" "You just did. How the hell did you know where I was?" The way this guy called me "Ms. Asagiri" reminded me just a little too much of Her Supreme Exaltedness. "Everytime someone tries to access certain materials which are in my purview, a bulletin is sent to me. I recognized *your* name at once." "Why exactly are you in charge of Sylia's journal?" "Well ... my primary focus of scholarship is the period in Japanese Pre-Apocalyptic History during which the Knight Sabres were active. I .." "Hold it. What's this `Apocalypse' anyway?" He blinked, then made a short laughing noise. "Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you probably wouldn't know that. The Apocalypse was the final phase of what we refer to as the Final War, beginning in the mid-eighties of the twenty-first century, during which various corporate and political entities used nuclear weapons against one another. Large tracts of Terra were rendered more or less uninhabitable for centuries ..." "Oh, shit." "... especially following the nuclear winter that this caused. The Apocalypse was followed by nearly six centuries of the Dark Ages, ending only within the last two hundred years, when Queen Serenity united the various enclaves of humanity in the Crystal Kingdom, and expelled ... but I'm rambling. In any case, my area is what happened before that, and I'm currently revising my doctoral thesis, as new information has recently come to light on the subject of the Knight Sabers." "You mean me?" I asked, bluntly. "Oh, no. I referred to the discovery of the memoirs of a Mr. Leon McNichols, entitled "To Serve and Deflect: A Life in the AD Police". There is a considerable section about your ... previous existence therein, as Mr. McNichols was, as you of all people are aware, infatuated to an almost obsessive degree with you." "Great," I muttered. What had that lunatic written about me?! If he'd gone on about our "wild romance", I was gonna dig him up and ... "However, now that you are available for an interview, I was wondering if you would be willing to ..." "No." He blinked. "I ... beg your pardon?" "I wouldn't be willing to sit around and let you grill me about my life and times. I've got better things to do!" Okay, so I didn't, but he didn't need to know that. "But Ms. Asagiri ... may I call you Priss?" "Do and I'll come over there and kick your ass." "Ms. Asagiri, I don't think you realize the paucity of primary sources about the age you lived in. Ms. Stingray's journal is extremely cryptic at parts, and the other sources were often unaware of the importance of the Knight Sabres in the overall scheme of things. For example, on the night of December 15, 2038 ..." "I haven't a clue what I was doing. My memories only go to August, 2033." "Oh? I see ..." The twerp looked pretty downcast at this. "I'm terribly sorry for wasting your time then. If you'd like, I could give you access to the materials that ..." "Thanks." I hit the button marked Cancel on the terminal. "I'm done here," I said to the computer as the Dean's image faded away. "Please come again, Citizen Asagiri," it said, returning my card. I checked my watch. It was about time to meet Kerropi for lunch, and I hadn't dug up any leads at all in my pursuit of Lady Mars. Life stinks, sometimes. Okonomiyaki really hadn't changed much in nine hundred years. I didn't have much of an appetite, so I mostly watched Kerropi eat. "You ... um, really have a serious grudge against ... uh, THEM, don't you?" he asked. "Well, they've screwed up my death, and I don't think much of the life they've given me, and I *really* don't care for their fashion sense. So, yeah, it could be said I have a grudge." I'd told him about my ... unusual entry into this world weeks ago. He'd seemed completely fascinated by it, wanting to get all the details he could. He stopped eating, and stared at me for a moment. I wasn't really comfortable looking into those purple eyes, for some reason, so I sipped my ... it *tasted* like Coke, but I was pretty sure that it wasn't. Kerropi leaned towards me. "You're not the only one who thinks like that, you know?" I looked at him curiously. "No kidding." "No kidding. There are lots of people in the city who have the exact same opinions as you do." I leaned towards him. Our noses were about a centimeter apart. "Are you one of those people?" "Let's just say, I sympathize. There's a meeting of ... several people who aren't thrilled with the way the Queen is running things this afternoon. You wanna go?" Well well well. Lil' ol' Kerropi was a member of a secret society, huh? "Sounds interesting," I said, quietly. "Let's go." So he led me to the meeting place of his bunch which was in the Bay area. Maritime shipping was a big business in the Kingdom as there were some hefty statutes against the sort of air pollution that airplanes caused. Anyway, that naturally led to the creation of the usual "dock" district in Crystal Tokyo. On the surface, it looked only a bit rougher than the rest of town. The meeting was in a warehouse. There were about a hundred people there, ranging from a few other people who worked at the show, to some other guys I'd seen on the palace grounds as I'd been leaving it. There was this one old woman in the corner, keeping to herself, who looked strangely familiar, but I couldn't place her. One guy stood up on a small podium that had been erected in the center of the warehouse, and coughed to get everyone's attention. "Um, good afternoon. I'm very glad that you could all come to this meeting, a very special meeting ... because we are honored to have a very special guest in our midst. The man who struck a blow for the emancipation of the human spirit last month. Mr. Arduin Daeden." The man who stepped up to take the guy's place was at least seven feet tall, and nearly four feet broad. The name didn't ring any bells, but the minute I saw his face I knew where I'd seen it before: in the newstories I'd spent the morning reading. This was the guy who'd tried to kill Queen Serenity. There was a lot of whispering going on as he took his place on the podium. It all stopped dead as he began to speak. "You do me too much honor by describing my actions as a blow. They were an attempt at a blow, nothing more ..." Suddenly he stopped, and seemed to scan the crowd. "But not everyone here is sympathetic to our cause ... THAT ONE!" The old woman in the corner suddenly found herself the target of a bunch of people who'd been covertly packing iron. (Or whatever you'd call carrying hand-held weaponry these days.) They didn't shoot. I got the feeling that they were just waiting for the order, though. "A spy?" someone in the crowd asked. "Oh, no. Far more than that," the old woman said in a voice I knew. The shawl came off, and the veil, and the baggy clothes, and underneath it all was her. Lady Mars. More or less as I remembered her from her appearance at the club nine hundred years ago, but with one major difference -- the patch over her left eye. She was also wearing green combat fatigues, instead of a dress. "Indeed, far more dangerous than a spy," Arduin said calmly. "The question is," she said slowly, "can I flame you before they shoot me? Because I'm willing to trade my life for your death, Arduin. Don't doubt that." "Oh, I don't. But the question is actually, are you willing to trade my death for your life ... *and* that of another, only peripherally involved in all this? THAT ONE." Instantly, I found myself in the exact same position that Mars was in. Guns with their business end pointed at me. Even lil' ol' Kerropi was training a pistol on me with an almost apologetic look on his face. She noticed me for the first time, and a flicker of surprise crossed her face. Then her mouth turned up in a quirky smile. "You're right, of course. I can't allow any harm to come to innocents like her." "And if I were a trusting soul, I'd take that as an assurance of your good conduct. But I'm not. So, here ..." He tossed a crystalline bracelet across the length of the warehouse (an enormous throw) to Mars. "You know the drill." She studied it, sighed, and clicked it on her wrist. "So now what?" she asked. "Now you die, sweet Mars." The guns surrounding me began to lower, and I figured I'd never have a better moment to make my move. I jumped at Kerropi, grabbing his gun, and slamming a punch to his jaw for good measure. Then I started to pick off the guys holding guns on her before anyone realized what was happening. The gun was a lot lighter than any of the sidearms I'd become familiar with, and no bullets shot out when I pulled the trigger. Instead there was a brief burst of light, and a sound like thunder, and whatever I was pointing at fell over with a black hole in it. A handheld energy firearm. Cool. Meanwhile, Mars was cutting through the other gunslingers with some weird martial arts moves that looked like they belonged on the movie screen, but that worked frighteningly well. "Head for the door!" she called out. To me, I guess. Well, sounded like a good idea. I grabbed Kerropi, holding him in a head lock with the pistol to his braincase. "Nobody moves! Or buddy boy here gets it!" "You will not escape," Arduin stated coolly. He seemed to be taking this little twist unexpectedly well. There were lots of guns pointed at me, but nobody seemed willing to fire. I backed towards the door. "I won't not try," I informed him as I stood on the threshold, beside Mars. Quickly, I threw Kerropi to the side, and started running. "This way!" she shouted as the sounds of many other guns like the one I was carrying discharged behind me. She led me to a manhole, and pulled it off with very little effort. "Down! Hit the ground running!" I jumped down the hole, and started down the tunnel at the bottom. I could hear her running behind me ... Eventually, she stopped running, and leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. "I must be getting out of shape," she muttered. "This would never have bothered me a few centuries ago ..." I was on the verge of exhaustion, but I hid it a little better as I slumped against the other side of the tunnel. She smiled at me. "Long time, no see, Priss. How are you?" I smiled back. "Just great." I lifted the gun. "Now before I blow your head off, would you mind telling me why the hell you did it?!" She looked shocked. "Huh? What are you ... you mean putting on the bracelet?" "No, you stupid idiot! I mean giving the orders!" She stared at me, blankly. "What orders?" "The orders to have me cloned! What the fuck other orders have you given lately?!" She shook her head. "I never gave any orders to have you cloned. Why would I do something like that?" "You bloody well tell me! The last thing *I* remember is that stupid karaoke contest where your people got my DNA!" I was beginning to lose it, all the anger and pain of what I'd gone through in the last few weeks coming to the fore ... "Yes, that's true ... but we never cloned you, Priss. Why would we do something like that when we had the original you in cryogenic suspension?" Sailor Moon/Bubblegum Crisis "Best of All the Years" Episode 3 (To review: Priscilla S. Asagiri has awakened in early thirtieth century Crystal Tokyo. She is outraged to be told that due to the expense involved in her restoration, she will not be permitted to end her life, but must rather pay back her "debt to society". Furious and grieving for her long-dead friends, Priss swears to find Lady Mars, and exact an explanation for the orders that led to her resurrection (which had come from Mars). This task proceeds at a slow pace for six weeks, when she finds herself catapulted into a meeting of rebels against the government of Crystal Tokyo, led by Arduin Daeden, who had attempted to assassinate Queen Serenity. Lady Mars is also present at the meeting, and is rescued by Priss, who then demands an explanation for her cloning. Mars responds that there has been no cloning, that Priss had been in cryogenic suspension.) "What?" I asked weakly. "Priss, you're not a clone! We did get your DNA at that contest, but we never had to use it, because eight years later you ..." "But Serenity told me that I was a clone, damn it!" I shouted. This didn't make any sense. Why the hell would she ... "No. That *can't* be true, Priss. She doesn't lie. She doesn't always tell the whole truth, but she wouldn't tell a bald-faced lie like that. What exactly did she say to you?" she pressed. I closed my eyes. "She said that ... I wasn't actually Priss Asagiri in the fullest sense of the word. And then she started talking about how clones of people weren't considered reincarnations of those people, but .." "But she never said that *you* were a clone of Priss, right?" Mars interrupted triumphantly. "Misdirection. She wanted you to think that you were a clone ... for whatever reason." "But what about your orders? She said that I'd been brought back on *your* orders." She considered. "I did leave standing orders that any of my charges who were in suspension should be released if I ever resigned ... and you are my responsibility, in a way. I didn't expect Serenity to go through with them, since I thought that she'd be hoping I'd come back." "Okay ... start from the beginning, all right? How did I get into suspended animation? I don't remember anything past August of 2033 ..." "An artificial memory block. It's a fairly simple telepathic technique. I could undo it ... if I had my powers." "Powers?" I asked wearily. "I have certain ... talents that I've developed over the centuries. Unfortunately, *this* ..." She held up the bracelet she'd put on under Arduin's orders. " ... prevents me from using them." "So you can't do squat, in other words?" I said disgustedly. "Oh, I wouldn't say that," she said with deceptive calm. She moved faster than anything I've ever seen, grabbed the gun I was still holding on her, and pulled it out of my hand. "I'm still much stronger, faster, and tougher than any mortal, Priss," she said calmly. "Don't piss me off, okay?" That was it. That was the straw that broke the camel's back. I slumped down to the floor of the tunnel, and burst into tears. I hadn't cried so much since ... since Sylvie had ... "Oh, megamisama, Priss ..." Mars muttered, and knelt down beside me. She tried to put a hand on my shoulder ... "Don't. Fucking. Touch. Me!" I shouted between the sobs. She drew back, giving me a nice, safe distance. After a few moments, I was coherent again. "It's bad enough the lot of you drag me into this bloody insane future, make me into a goddamn BOOMEROID ..." "What are you talking about *now*?" Mars demanded. I yanked up the back of my shirt to show her the thing on my back. She stared at it. "What the hell is *that*?" she muttered. She started to reach out and touch it, but I jerked away. "It's some kind of Medic Alert implant so that I can't kill myself and thus screw your government out of the money they spent to clone me ..." "You're not a clone. And why on earth would they make such a huge `implant' when they can make something like that practically submicroscopic?" "So what are you saying?" I asked. "I'm saying that that's not what you think it is. Will you please let me take a look at it?" I stared at her. I didn't want to trust her. She was the one who'd gotten me into this bloody mess in the first place ... Mars handed me the gun. "Put it to my forehead," she instructed me. "If I do anything but examine that thing, pull the trigger. I'm trusting you with my life. Can't you give me a little trust?" I swallowed. I set the barrel of the gun against the bridge of her nose. "Move slowly," I whispered. She slowly reached towards my back. Towards the implant. I felt her warm fingers brush against my back. I tightened my grip on the trigger. I felt a small tearing sensation. She pulled away, holding the thing in one hand. "It's not an implant," Mars said simply. "It was attached to your back by some adhesive gunk, but it came off pretty easily." I lowered the gun. "Okay, then. What is it?" I was trembling. She examined it. "A mini-holographic projector. The sort of thing that we use to send messages by courier. Lessee ..." She manipulated tiny controls on the device, and a small screen displayed characters that I couldn't make out. "There's two messages hardwired into the memory. One's got my name on it, one's got yours. You mind if I take a look at mine first?" "Go right ahead ..." She pressed a button, and the hologram flickered into being above the device. It was Serenity, her Amazon bodyguard Jupiter, and the blue haired woman I'd punched who I'd been told was called Mercury. With the three of them were another woman with long blond hair, and a man in a lavender suit. They were all about six inches tall. "Raye, we miss you," the man said simply. "It's not any fun coming home when you're not here," the other blonde said with a smile. "You make every day a little more interesting," stated Mercury. "And your generals are all reporting to *me*. It's a bloody nuisance!" Jupiter snarled, but there was humor in her eyes. "Raye. Come back to us. Please," Serenity spoke quietly, but there was a gentle, pleading quality to her voice. The hologram faded out. Mars sat staring at it for a long moment. "Hey," I said. "Are you okay?" Suddenly I realized something. "Wait a minute. They brought me back so that I could deliver that thing to you? Like I'm some kind of carrier pigeon?" "I didn't know Mina was back on Earth," she muttered, as if she hadn't heard me. "They ... they all came together to ask me ..." "Yo!" I interrupted. "I'd like to take a look at *my* little telegram from the Queen? If that's not too much trouble?" She fixed me with a very hard stare. "No trouble at all." She manipulated the controls, turned the hologram so that it'd be facing me, and stabbed a button. A six inch Queen Serenity confronted me, standing alone this time. "Ms. Asagiri, I apologize for the deception I have engaged in towards you. It is time for you to know the truth." And my mind exploded. I was at the Karaoke Contest again, feeling a needle into my shoulder. I turned around, and saw a guy wearing a coat with sleeves covered with little pointy things stumble past me in a drunken stupor. I decided not to tangle with him. And then things sped up. Fights with boomers, with people, singing, dancing, sex, talking, watching my friends age, watching myself start to slow down ... In the welter of images and memories, I struggled to grab onto something concrete ... And I was in my hardsuit. I was hurting all over. I'd just dispatched a bunch of the newest combat boomers that GENOM had begun to put out on the street. There had been so *many* of them recently. We were hard pressed ... "Priss, help!" I heard Nene shout over the communications net. I sighed. She'd gotten just a bit better over the last eight years, but she was still basically helpless in combat. And just as nerdy as ever ... "Hold it, Nene, I'm coming ..." I started running for her position. The radar showed no hostiles in the area, but I couldn't get a fix on Linna and Sylia either ... What the hell was wrong with Nene? Probably some boomer'd fallen over on her and she couldn't budge it, or something equally stupid. "Help, Priss, help!" I got to her position, and she was just standing with her back to me in the middle of an open area. "Whassamatter, your suit freeze up on you?" I asked as I walked towards her. She didn't say anything. I tapped her on the shoulder. She fell over, and I saw that her face had been pulped. There was only a red mess where her head had been. The rest of her was fine, just .. nothing left of her face. There was a tiny recording device near her communicator, endlessly repeating her voice crying out for my help. I realized that I was on my knees, cradling her body, and tears streaming down behind my visor. "No ... no ... you stupid, stupid little idiot ..." I heard my own voice say. "*I'm* the one who's supposed to die first, not you ..." "Priss!" Sylia's voice crackled across the comm. "What's the matter?" "Nene ... oh, god ..." "Priss, is Nene hurt?" "They got her, Sylia ... they got her." A long silence. "Priss, hang on, we'll be there in ..." Sudden explosions across the radio. "Sylia, we've got company!" Linna screamed. "Priss, get yourself together ..." "No." "Priss, damn it, I'm ordering you!" "I quit." I turned off the communicator. I pulled off my helmet. I waited for them. They'd set it up perfectly, dragging me here with that fake distress call, so that I wouldn't be there when they ambushed Sylia and Linna. GENOM had won. They'd made a boomer that was as smart and as cruel as a human being. "Come on, you metal bastards ... this is the day you've all been waiting for ..." I whispered, holding Nene's corpse to myself. And they came. Dozens of them. They surrounded us, and began to power up their weapons. "It's a good day to die," I muttered. "But the day is not yet over!" a voice exclaimed behind me. I heard shouts, and watched as the boomers were flamed, lasered, electrocuted, and blasted with frost, all around me. It was like I was watching a movie ... I wasn't really there, none of this was happening ... and then they stepped into view. The Sailor Soldiers. I'd heard the legends, just like every other kid in MegaTokyo. But nobody believed those stories, any more than the ones about the martial artist kid as tough as a wild horse, or the western goddesses living in that temple ... it was just stuff someone made up. A myth. "Holy crap," the one in red, the dark haired one, whispered. "We're too late," the blue one sighed. "There was nothing that you could have done, Mercury," a soft voice came from behind me. "She chose her own fate, ultimately ..." And then the goddess walked around where I could see her. She shone with a light that was so ... perfect. "Rest in peace, Nene Romanova ... you will be remembered, I promise." She walked over to one of the boomers that was still somewhat functional. Her face darkened with anger, and she reached down, and pulled the robot's head from its body, and held it up to her eye level. "I know you can hear me," she whispered. "I will not permit it. You will not take this world into the grave with you, Quincy. I WILL NOT PERMIT IT!" She flung the head away just a second before it exploded. As if nothing unusual had just happened, she spoke to the tall, green suited one. "Jupiter, take Ms. Romanova's body and make arrangements for a proper burial. We have much yet to do today." "Right." She started towards me. The thought that they were going to take Nene away penetrated my consciousness, and I lifted my railgun in response. "Don't," I said. Suddenly my suit went dead as all the electricity in it surged away. The tall one smiled grimly. The red one put a hand on her shoulder. "Don't hurt her," she said. It was a request, not a plea. "I won't hurt her permanently," the tall one said calmly. She only broke both my arms. I yanked my mind away from that agony. I was adrift in the memories again, watching the explosion of GENOM tower, quietly weeping, and finally lying down in a coffin ... no, not a coffin, a cryogenic tube ... and then the grayness. I pulled myself from the memories, into the hard reality of the tunnel. Mars was staring at me as I came out of the convulsions the sudden freeing of the block on my memories had caused. "Are you all right?" she asked. "Nene." "No," I said. "I'm never going to be all right." I felt, rather than saw, her start to reach out to put her hand on my shoulder ... then she paused, and retracted the arm. "I'm sorry," she said, simply. "But it wasn't your fault, Priss." "Bullshit," I muttered. "You still haven't told me why you did it." "When we found you, I recognized you at once. We'd gotten your DNA earlier, and we'd been hoping to eventually approach you about letting us get a braintape ... but things went crazy before we could. I ... liked you. You remind me, in a lot of ways, of myself when I was younger. So I set things up so that you could go into cryogenic sleep." "You should have just let her kill me," I said bleakly. She shook her head. "She wouldn't have done that. Anyway, you spent the last eight hundred or so years inside the fortress in Tibet that we were operating out of. I was hoping that when we thawed you out, you'd be amenable to psychotherapy. But I never got around to doing it, and I guess that Serenity eventually had other ideas ..." "Yeah, no shit. Like using me as a goddamn burro!" "I think the term, courier, would be a little more appropriate," she said with a sardonic smile. "Shove it." The smile vanished. "Look, Priss ... I can't do a damn thing about the hand you've been dealt. All I can do is, hopefully, get us out of here and back to someplace safe, where I can get this bracelet off. But I have to get Arduin." "Why?" I asked. "Because he tried to kill my Queen!" Mars shouted. "I can't let that go!" "*She* did. Whassamatter, Mars, feeling guilty over something you had no control over? Trying to atone for something that wasn't your fault?" She held a finger up to my nose. "Don't push me, punk. This is *not* the same thing as your guilt complex over Nene." "The fuck it isn't! You'll do anything to make up for whatever little failure you suffered that let him get close enough to even try to make the shot, right? Well, I'd give anything for just a little more speed, a little more power, to have gotten there in time ... she wasn't supposed to die like that, damn it!" "You're quite correct, about that, at least." She suddenly looked like she wanted to bite her tongue off. The implications of that remark sunk in, and I remembered how Serenity had spoken about Nene, and ... "She was working for you guys, wasn't she?" I said in a very soft voice. "She was trying to prevent the Apocalypse." "No." Mars shook her head. "Nothing could have stopped the Apocalypse. It was as inevitable as ... as a sunset, or a coming of age. What we were trying to do was ensure that there'd be enough people to make sure that civilization would be able to get a start again, after the Dark Ages ... after the freeze." "So by not saving her ..." "You maybe added a day or two to the time it took to make the recovery, and that's it. Or maybe things in one isolated corner of the world were a bit worse because she didn't get her job finished. It doesn't make any difference, in the long run." I closed my eyes, and shook my head. Suddenly, I heard footsteps in the distance. I went absolutely still. "Down the corridor," Mars said in a very soft voice that was not a whisper. "Past the junction." She began to move in that direction. Slowly, I followed her, keeping a firm grip on the gun. In the corridor that intersected with the one we were in, Arduin was speaking with a figure in dark robes ... who was hovering over the ground, carrying a crystal ball in his lap. From the expression on Mars' face, I gather that she knew him. "Master, will you not grant me more power?" Arduin asked. "You dare to ask this? For nearly a thousand years, I have protected and hidden you, the last of your kind. And now, in the very instant when we come nearest to the goal, you fail me!" "It was the intervention of the unpredicted element, Master. The actions of the human were completely unexpected, and illogical. The intelligence we were given led us to believe that she would welcome any attempt to exterminate the Senshi." "Do you have any idea of the nature of the human you sought to use?" the robed one demanded. "I am surprised that you did not recognize the one your creators programmed as a primary target." Arduin stood silently for a moment. "But that is thoroughly illogical. The clone of the individual termed Saber Blue or Asagiri Priscilla should have no memories of her opposition to my creators." Creators. Programmed. Illogical. I turned very slowly to look at Mars. "He's mine," I said quietly. "You can't have him." Before she could do anything, I stepped into the entrance of the corridor, and said, "I am not a clone." And then I started shooting. The bolts from the gun slammed into Arduin, and passed right through the guy in the robes. I wasn't really looking at him, though. I was watching the huge man whom I'd just shot four times pull himself to his feet, metal gleaming where the artificial flesh had burnt off. And then he expanded even further, clothing and flesh shredding instantly. Arduin Daeden was a boomer. I started pulling back on the trigger even faster, sending shot after shot at the metallic abomination that was slowly beginning to walk towards me. It ignored my shots. "Damn, I could use my hardsuit right now," I muttered under my breath. The boomer was less than six feet away from me. It opened its mouth. The particle beam cannon in its throat began to glow. I leapt at the thing, shoved the barrel of the gun down into the cannon, and flung myself back ... And it exploded. The shock front caught me in the back, and I knew nothing. When I awoke, I couldn't hear anything, and I was in a universe of pain. Mars was standing over me with an awestruck expression on her face. Her lips moved. I wanted to ask her what "'shai dorsai" meant, but at that moment, I wanted to lose consciousness a little more. So I did. There was a trial, of course. I mean, in an ordered society, you can't just let people blow up parts of the sewer system without an inquest into their actions and motives. My defense, such as he was, was mostly intent on demonstrating that neither Lady Mars nor any member of the Royal Government had instructed me to take any actions, that I had acted purely on my own initiative. Which was, in a way, true. The trial concluded, and the judge found me not guilty of wanton destruction, although he did strongly suggest that I take a firearms safety course. However, after making his ruling, the judge made a speech commending me for my quick thinking in the defense of a valued member of the government of the Crystal Kingdom, and for my courage in dealing with a potentially fatal menace to the realm. "In my opinion, Citizen Asagiri, Crystal Tokyo is very much in your debt." From my hospital bed, I grinned at him. That was about all I *could* do, at that point. I was released from the hospital a few weeks later, and decided to finally pay a visit to the memorial. It was a tall marble column on which four statues -- me, Linna, Sylia, and Nene -- stood, facing the east. We were displayed in our hardsuits, but without helmets. Whoever the artist had been, he hadn't quite gotten our faces right. My nose wasn't ... but anyway, the plaque on the column read as follows: Knight Sabres 2031 C.E. - 2041 C.E. As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being. C.G. Jung, Memories, Dreams, Reflections The day I visited it, it was raining. I stood there, in the rain, staring up at the artists conception of what I and ... the people I'd loved most in the world had looked like, and puzzling over the quote. I heard a step behind me, and I slowly turned around to see Mars. She was wearing the costume of the Sailor Soldiers under a green raincoat. We stared at each other for a long moment. "You didn't visit," I said, not accusing, just stating a fact. "It wouldn't have been appropriate," she said, not apologizing. "Could you please tell me something? Why'd you people build that thing? And what's with that ... fortune cookie expression?" "Jung would be thrilled to know you've such a high opinion of him," Mars said dryly. "For the first ... well, this is the short version: quite a few of the jobs that the Knight Sabers took in the latter part of the 2030s were for us, sometimes indirectly." "So what? Why honor us for something we didn't even know about?" She gave me a look that was eerily like the one Serenity had given me weeks ago, the sort of look that makes you feel very, very small. "Soldiers often fight battles without being aware of the overall strategic purpose of their mission. Do they not deserve to be honored for their sacrifices?" I didn't have an answer for that. "With regards to the quotation ... let's just say that it has to do with choosing to take action rather than simply accepting bad things that happen to you. Do you get the idea?" I nodded. That, I could understand. "So now what?" "I bear apologies from Queen Serenity. She never intended for you to become involved in that little matter." "Shouldn't have defrosted me, then." "Probably not. But that's the way it goes. She just wanted you to deliver that message, and then get out. She knew that Daeden was a boomer, but she couldn't reveal that to anyone. She didn't know that he had a connection to our enemies. Do you hate her?" she asked suddenly. "I don't understand her. I don't understand why she had to be so bloody deceptive." "What kind of government do you think we have?" I wasn't expecting that. "I dunno ... constitutional monarchy?" "Close. Do you know what timocracy is?" "Democracy? That's ..." "No, TIM-ocracy. It's the most advanced form of democracy, where there aren't any elected representatives. People vote on everything. In essence, the people become the government." She paused. "If enough of the voting populace became convinced that Serenity was violating the ideals of Crystal Tokyo, they could vote to have her removed from power. That's why she had to be circumspect. What she was doing, in trying to deal with an organization with ties to forces that are in opposition to us, treaded dangerously close to a violation of our ethics. It's not permitted for us to try and interfere with what people believe. If they want to throw us out, we can't just start arresting them. But this was .. different." I nodded. I doubted that I'd ever really *understand* what she was talking about, but I did get the gist. "No ... I don't hate her. But I don't like her very much." "Neither do I, some days. Well, I also bear some other things." She pulled a pair of envelopes out of her inside pocket, and handed them to me. "Read the one from the Queen first," she advised. I opened it, and read the single paper inside. "Let it be known that in recognition of the debt owed to Citizen Asagiri by Crystal Tokyo, Her Majesty extends the charity of declaring any debts owed by Citizen Asagiri null and void." "Cute," I said. "So that's what she meant by, in the truest sense possible." "You're free and clear. If you want to kill yourself, no one will stop you." I looked up and across at her. It had been a while since I'd even thought of doing that. "Not even you?" She didn't look me directly in the eye. "If you try when I'm not around. I make no promises otherwise." "Huh. So how does this square with TINSTAAFL?" "Simple. Her Majesty decided that the debt that you owed her was more than canceled out by the tremendous favor you did her by saving my life. There are many ways of paying for something, you know." "So who's this one from?" I asked, looking at the other, unmarked envelope. "Read it and find out." I tore it open and stared at it: Priss, by the time you read this, I'll have been dead for a long time. I don't know how long. Rei won't tell me exactly who she's working for, only that they can guarantee that you will be brought back into a more peaceful world. Which ain't gonna be anytime soon. With GENOM gone, the other big corps are starting to get into serious scraps over what's left. MegaTokyo's even more of a battlefield now than it was when all that stuff went down. She's also told me that before they put you to sleep, you were blaming yourself for what happened to Nene. I wish I could have scrounged some kind of audio recorder so that I could include a little verbal message with this -- my voice saying, "It wasn't your fault!" over and over again. God, Priss, Nene was on a clock, just like the rest of us, and she took every single risk that we did. It was just her time. For you to insist that you could have changed the outcome is really insulting. You're as bad as Sylia. I have in front of me a copy of her journal (it was anonymously published a couple days ago). And I think you might find the last entry informational. March 15, 2041 It's not right for a mother to outlive her children. A couple days after that, she walked into GENOM tower with some kind of micronuke in her briefcase. We thought you were dead, like Nene. I still remember her face when we got to where you had been transmitting ... she just stood there, her helmet off, staring, with no expression on her face, at all those boomers. And then she turned and walked away. You're self-destructive enough as it is, Priss. You don't need this kind of guilt. So just accept that you weren't responsible, and feel bad, feel angry, feel sad ... but not guilty. I envy you. The world you live in will be so wondrous ... but probably also terrifying. That's why I turned down Rei's offer. But I had to send you this little missive. Enjoy the future, red eyes. You mind if I date Leon? Love, Yamazaki Linna. I folded up the letter, and slid it into my pocket, telling myself that the water on my cheeks was rain. Mars was gazing at me. "I didn't think it was right that she not know what had really happened to you," she said quietly. "Thanks," I said, my voice a little hoarse. Probably from all the yelling I'd been doing lately. "Well ... like I said, you're free, Priscilla S. Asagiri. By the way, what does the S stand for? None of the information we've recovered ..." "It's my middle name. Serena." I watched her start at that, and blanch a little bit. "What's the matter?" I asked. She looked away. "I had a ... friend named Serena, once. She died." She was silent for a very long time. "She annoyed the living hell out of me, and I cared about her more than I was ever able to tell her, and ... I'd have given my life to save hers, but in the final hour, that wasn't enough. And even though there was nothing I could have done to change the outcome, it's still ... my fault." She turned, and started to walk away. I looked up at Nene's statue. For some reason, it was the most true to life of all of them. I could almost imagine her winking ... "Hey!" I called out. She turned back, wordlessly. "Did you know Nene well?" I asked. She shook her head. "Never met her." I was reaching ... "I'll make you a deal ... I'll tell you about her .. if you'll tell me more about your Serena ... deal?" "Sounds ... okay," she said. So I rushed to catch up to her. "There any good bars in this town?" I asked. "Oh, I know one or two," she replied. "Y'know, Mars ..." "Please, call me Raye." "Y'know, Raye ..." "And if you say `this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship', I'm gonna have to slug you or something." I grinned through the rain. I wasn't gonna say that. What I was gonna say was, the best of all the years ... are just beginning. The End Author's Notes This story is dedicated, with respect and admiration, to Jeanne Hedge, for putting up with my efforts to combine a comedic fantasy with dramatic science fiction. I strongly recommend that anyone who reads this visit her homepage at http://www.accsyst.com/jhedge/main.html After I completed part one of this story, I realized that part of Priss' dilemma was inspired by my reading of Chris Willmore's Ranma 2096 side story, "A Winter's Tale". I also recommend that anyone who reads this check out the Ranma 2096 webpage at http://qlink.queensu.ca/~4cw6/ The expression that Raye uses to describe Priss at one point ('shai dorsai, meaning "real, genuine dorsai") is taken from the Child Cycle of Gordon R. Dickson. Again, the novels and stories of this epic come with my highest recommendation, especially the short story "Brothers". One more time: Sailor Moon was created by Takeuchi Naoko, and brought to North America by DiC. The characters of Bubblegum Crisis were created by Kenichi Sonada (and others) and brought to North America by AnimEigo. Nobody sue me, okay? Chris Davies, Advocate for Darkness, Part-Time Champion of Light. "I am not a very nice person anymore." - Rand al'Thor, "Crown of Swords"